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genocide
06-04-2009, 08:58 AM
http://www.truploader.com/view/142316

This is a teaser/preview of an animation I have been working on for about three days now, I have 19 seconds so far, and the teaser is about the third scene, I guess you could call it a scene, I don't know.

Just watch the animation and here is a little information about what it's about:
Guy talks to some girl, the chicks boyfriend gets pissed and beats the hell out of him, says something about if he messes with him again he is gonna be dead. Guy gets mad, freaks out and goes on a rampage killing everyone that stands in his way and eventually makes his way to the chicks boyfriend and epic battle between them.
Any thoughts or encouragement to help improve the animation will be greatly appreciated, also, if this does get complete, you will be in the credits.

Thanks again guys(:

alcaknight
06-04-2009, 09:04 AM
The stars when the blue guy stood up did not look like stars. Fix those up. When the crates fell on the red guy, there didn't seem to be enough force, and the guy didn't even move. He kind of just fell over and had no expression of pain or hurt when the crates crushed his legs and arms. The blood had no splattering. When the blue guy gets up and turns around, his right arm is detached from the body. Pretty good, though. Nice job.

Arch-Angel
06-04-2009, 09:28 AM
The way the boxes are placed is ****ed up. They would fall and crush the person.

The stars look like jizz . . . .

genocide
06-04-2009, 10:02 AM
The way the boxes are placed is ****ed up. They would fall and crush the person.

The stars look like jizz . . . .

Hahaha, ya they kinda have that jizz feeling to them lol.

and ya I know, it's supposed to be a very unstable stack of boxes.

I'll fix the stars in a bit and post the revised teaser.

genocide
06-04-2009, 10:15 AM
The stars when the blue guy stood up did not look like stars. Fix those up. When the crates fell on the red guy, there didn't seem to be enough force, and the guy didn't even move. He kind of just fell over and had no expression of pain or hurt when the crates crushed his legs and arms. The blood had no splattering. When the blue guy gets up and turns around, his right arm is detached from the body. Pretty good, though. Nice job.

He moved when it fell on his legs, just not on his arms, well I did kinda move his arms, but how is he supposed to move when his legs and arms are trapped?
Not enough force, hmm, didn't seem that way to me; but that's okay.
And about the detached arm, that was kinda a mistake and kinda fits to him just getting his butt beat by a guy he the scene previous to this one..anyways, thanks for the comment!

EDIT: The arm was easier to fix than I thought, so I fixed it now!(:

Revised version: http://www.truploader.com/view/142316

Arch-Angel
06-04-2009, 10:26 AM
Good job! Now the stars look like dry cum spots. lol.

genocide
06-04-2009, 10:28 AM
Good job! Now the stars look like dry cum spots. lol.

Yes! That's exactly what I was going for, jeeze it kinda looks like the back of my pillow...haha jk guys.

Arch-Angel
06-04-2009, 11:09 AM
Just use the same style that you did for the others.

genocide
06-04-2009, 11:24 AM
Just use the same style that you did for the others.

Wait, for the other whats?

and whoo! 30.4 seconds.

Arch-Angel
06-04-2009, 11:28 AM
The other stars.
I like helping people >_>

genocide
06-04-2009, 11:30 AM
The other stars.
I like helping people >_>

Oh, you mean the smaller ones?

Arch-Angel
06-04-2009, 11:31 AM
Yeah. Stars are too far away, so no matter what angle the camera is at, the stars will not get any larger.

edit: I hope you know what a star is >_> They're not glowing dots in the earth's atmosphere.

genocide
06-04-2009, 12:02 PM
Yeah. Stars are too far away, so no matter what angle the camera is at, the stars will not get any larger.

edit: I hope you know what a star is >_> They're not glowing dots in the earth's atmosphere.

Oh jeeze, I just got what you were saying, I was thinking that they might appear larger because you were zoomed in but I guess that doesn't make sense.

Thanks dude.

alcaknight
06-04-2009, 01:08 PM
Good job! Now the stars look like dry cum spots. lol.

lulz





































:Happy:

s-t-y-x
06-04-2009, 03:37 PM
the boxes are heavier than they seem

genocide
06-04-2009, 03:42 PM
the boxes are heavier than they seem


Cool?..........

doc
06-04-2009, 03:51 PM
That's good! It looks great when the guy runs up the boxes, and the bg gives it a really nice feel. Can't wait to see it!

s-t-y-x
06-04-2009, 05:26 PM
Cool?..........
I mean the guy moves them so easily but they flatten the guy who gets crushed by them.

Flood
06-04-2009, 06:18 PM
The animation was good, but the plot is horrible. You need to think up something more original. Also, why does that guy have to "Get to work"

Clips
06-04-2009, 06:21 PM
work on facial expressions n other shizz people said

genocide
06-04-2009, 08:10 PM
I mean the guy moves them so easily but they flatten the guy who gets crushed by them.

That's because they are VERY unstably set upon each other. So when he puts a foot down, it upsets the balance of the crates and then gravity pulls them down onto his boss and smashes him.


That's good! It looks great when the guy runs up the boxes, and the bg gives it a really nice feel. Can't wait to see it!

Thanks doc, It only gets better too. I am having a great time animating it so this is turning out to be something awesome! Thanks for the support.


The animation was good, but the plot is horrible. You need to think up something more original. Also, why does that guy have to "Get to work"

Well, I had to have a reason for why he is in the middle of no where.
He is moving crates as his job.


work on facial expressions n other shizz people said

I haven't released the updated version yet have I....ya his facial expression is totally different, he actually has pupils now, and he has some angry eyebrows haha(:
Ya I'm not gonna post anymore of this animation until it is finished.
EDIT: actually I will post the facial expression, just 'cause I love you guys. haha - http://www.truploader.com/view/775572


AND JUST A NOTE TO ALL, EVERYONE WHO HAS COMMENTED ON THIS THREAD WILL BE IN THE CREDITS OF THE ANIMATION, IF ANYONE HAS ANY OBJECTIONS TO THIS, PLEASE CONTACT ME VIA PRIVATE MESSAGE.
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Denial
06-05-2009, 12:38 AM
awesome lol just awesome

Denial
06-05-2009, 12:39 AM
wow i contributed nothing criticism-wise. do i still get to be in the credits? if i do then COOL!

power fuse0
06-05-2009, 12:42 AM
Why is it that i seem to be the only one who likes this animation.
Really nice imo :)

genocide
06-05-2009, 02:37 PM
Why is it that i seem to be the only one who likes this animation.
Really nice imo :)

I like it....haha

Thanks btw.

Also, update to all: I've figured out what song I'm using

Pychosocial - Slipknot...BA song, and it fits the animation nicely so far.