PDA

View Full Version : [Kit] HeartFruit (SPP Preview)



Kitsune
09-27-2009, 02:25 PM
Hey guys.
This is my first flash shown to you guys in a while, eh?
Anyway it's ****ing graphic intensive because of all the little lines I put in it. It lags for me on high quality, it's fine on Med quality and it looks decent. Low quality is awful. don't do it.

while watching keep in mind this is for halloween...

I ask you to please watch this over TWICE and then answer the questions below. (http://www.truploader.com/view/259229)

(the reason for watching twice is because this will only be the first bit of a bigger project with not so much focus on it. I think of you just watch it twice you'll have more of a shot of noticing things than a person watching it as a part of a bigger movie. If you disagree you can see it as much as you want, be my guest. I just would like you to then post how many times you ran through it.)

--after watching--

If you'd like to help me out please answer these questions:

Do you think I have a shot at placing in newgrounds Halloween if this is the beginning of a 3 minute feature? I have a whole storyboard and at this rate I think I can get a 3 minute done before then.

Did you find anything particularly disruptive to the quality of the movements?

Did you see anything that you found to be wrong in any way concerning aesthetics or how it looks? Proportional problems?

Did you notice any lag while playing in any level of quality?

If you watched it more than twice, how many times did you watch it?

Did you like it?

I've had comments about the reaction of the heart being pulled out not being 'dramatic' enough. Do you agree?

Thank you if you took the time to read and answer.

Edit: I've made the stalk that grows out of the ground in the end like 3x bigger but I don't think I have to upload it again.

Edit:

PLUS
Bonus really old unfinished tablet redraw animation for yall to see
http://www.truploader.com/view/407489

Miccool
09-27-2009, 04:23 PM
Wow... someone actually used inverse kinematics!... lol. Not much to say; it looks alright. Finished product might look cool with creepy music or something.

To get 3 mins... really depends on the person and how much time and commitment they put in.

It looks... okay. Interesting. Nothing special or terrible in it.

It didn't lag for me.

I watched it twice

Too short for me to like it

Heart pull out was like: "wtf... I don't really know what to expect but he just pulled out his heart... okay then."

Kitsune
09-27-2009, 05:11 PM
Haha I've just been calling it tweening or puppeting but Inverse Kinematics is a way cooler way to say it. Anyway I like that style. It saves more time and makes up for my procrastination. I'd like to do it well so that it doesn't work against me.

I didn't really mean do you think I can make it to 3 minutes, but if I have a shot at placing in the newgrounds halloween contest. I have the time to get to 3 minutes me thinks.

I'm looking for ways to make this special. I really have to think about it. As long as it's not horrible because of my procrastination I'm happy. :>

Thanks a ton, Miccool. You saying something I made isn't bad means a lot.

alcaknight
09-27-2009, 07:52 PM
When that screen came on when he pulled out the heart, I think that it either lasted too long or it should have flashed to white the third frame and went back to red after the white. So it would have been red white red instead of three frames red.

I actually really liked the look of that blood. I have always sucked at blood. I need to practice haha.

The physics seemed kind of weird on the heart throw, though. Overall, not too bad. Keep it up!

STUFF
09-27-2009, 09:47 PM
Yeah, I'd say you have a chance of placing on NG, but only if you make it more interesting than what it is now.

The limped walking was actually pretty realistic.

What bothered me was that the clouds, or at least I think they're clouds, didn't move.

I did not notice lag in medium or high quality.

I watched it twice, once in medium and once in high, although the animation was clear and easy to understand so once would've already sufficed.

It's good, but I'm not a big fan of these creepy animations. Just a personal opinion though.

Vile.
09-27-2009, 10:28 PM
IMO You might have a chance at placing on NG, but i think your graphics kind of suck. Do you have a tablet?

Also when he rips his heart out the sudden flood of blood on the screen didnt really fit.

Kitsune
09-27-2009, 11:29 PM
When that screen came on when he pulled out the heart, I think that it either lasted too long or it should have flashed to white the third frame and went back to red after the white. So it would have been red white red instead of three frames red.

I actually really liked the look of that blood. I have always sucked at blood. I need to practice haha.

The physics seemed kind of weird on the heart throw, though. Overall, not too bad. Keep it up!
I'm going to Tint the 2nd frame white, see how it looks, and tell you if I did it (edit: I'm keeping the effect. i think it looks better.), because it sounds like a good idea. I did it 3 frames because they're 3/20 of a second and I thought it's still an instant, just the shade with the spurt coming out of the figure would seem more apparent I thought. I'll see how your idea goes though.
Thanks. i was proud of the blood after I finished it. Flawed but I like how it looks.
The heart took me an hour. The reason it took me so long was because I kept re-doing it. I tried to get it to bounce for 45 minutes and thought I might have been spending a bit much time trying to make it bounce when at such a speed the heart could just 'splat' like a water balloon spitting out blood, but keeping it's structure because of the more strength I'd think a heart would have. I'll look at it again though.

Thanks. How many times did you watch it? Did you pause it and count the amount of blip frames there were or was it a lucky guess?

Yeah, I'd say you have a chance of placing on NG, but only if you make it more interesting than what it is now.

The limped walking was actually pretty realistic.

What bothered me was that the clouds, or at least I think they're clouds, didn't move.

I did not notice lag in medium or high quality.

I watched it twice, once in medium and once in high, although the animation was clear and easy to understand so once would've already sufficed.

It's good, but I'm not a big fan of these creepy animations. Just a personal opinion though.
Thanks!
I plan on making it interesting. i'm working on my storyboard to see what i can do to it a lot. I realize at the beginning it's a tad slow moving and sort of boring, especially during the second viewing I asked you to go through. Do you think I should speed up these waits between actions or do you think the spacing helps the clarity you mentioned more than it takes away from the quality of the pace?
that's the second comment I've got about the clouds, I'm going to tween them. I thought it wouldn't be a problem but of all crit I get from the NG audience, that would be pretty big. Thanks, Stuff, you've helped a lot.

IMO You might have a chance at placing on NG, but i think your graphics kind of suck. Do you have a tablet?

Also when he rips his heart out the sudden flood of blood on the screen didnt really fit.
What makes the graphics kinda suck? Is it my scratchy style of drawing/shading that doesn't fit your taste or do you see technical problems? Elaborate please so I can take something from this. I do use a tablet though.

Did the blood not fit realistically or aesthetically? Do you mean the flowing blood or the blood-red colored blip before the pull-out?
Thank you for your input but I need some more details if you're willing to help.

Cronos
09-28-2009, 12:49 AM
Ok.

I watched it three times.

I have no idea what quality animations will be submitted by other entrants, but yours is pretty good so far so yeah. I like how you used a certain gloomy feeling. Its extremely abstract, and I like it.

It didn't lag for me.

And I liked it yes.

finally, have you ever thought of animating with a silhouette style.

Like this: https://securehost34.hrwebservices.net/~magefor/phpnuke/images/upload/Jasper.jpg

Or this: http://fc06.deviantart.com/fs29/f/2008/054/2/6/Patapon__s_fever_by_averto.jpg

(The second one was from patapon)

I hope you finish this, its looking good.

Rabstar
09-28-2009, 01:44 AM
Yay, fullbody :3
I disliked the sketchy style, but it seemed you worked harder than using just gradients, which was good! ^-^
The tweening was a bit lazy, at parts, since the arm that moved was unsynced with the walk.
Maybe add a bit more story, cause atm, Im just like :
o.o' He pulled out his heart? Lived? The heart became a plant? wahhhht? >.<

But yeah, if you continue it, I can't wait to see the finished outcome.
^-^' If I can help in anyway, PM me! :D

Vile.
09-28-2009, 06:38 AM
Ok, sorry for not being specific, About the graphics I dont really like that scratchy style and i think it could be alot better. Remember to use the biggest brush when your zoomed in and the tablets pressure settings to maximise the use of it, if that makes sense.

The clouds could be easily tweened to slowly move into the distance, maybe even distort them so the move like an upside down version of the famous star wars text scrolling, if you understand me.

and the big blood blip before he rips his heart out, it didnt really fit. Goodluck and i wish you the best. Maybe if the blood hit the screen and dribled down it. You could alpha tween it aswell.

RawGreen
09-28-2009, 06:19 PM
I'm much rather too speechless to day anything but this <

alcaknight
09-28-2009, 06:26 PM
Kitsune, I watched it a couple of times. Went through some parts frame by frame.

Kitsune
09-28-2009, 06:28 PM
Ok.

I watched it three times.

I have no idea what quality animations will be submitted by other entrants, but yours is pretty good so far so yeah. I like how you used a certain gloomy feeling. Its extremely abstract, and I like it.

It didn't lag for me.

And I liked it yes.

finally, have you ever thought of animating with a silhouette style.

Like this: https://securehost34.hrwebservices.net/~magefor/phpnuke/images/upload/Jasper.jpg

Or this: http://fc06.deviantart.com/fs29/f/2008/054/2/6/Patapon__s_fever_by_averto.jpg

(The second one was from patapon)

I hope you finish this, its looking good.
Thank you Cronos.
I am 95% sure I'll be finishing this one. I'm in too deep to get out now. I now have 34 seconds and am revising the storyboard thoroughly.
for reference I'm looking at the entrants from last year. Animationwise I think I've got $250. I'm working on the script to have it better than what I have now. If the Lady's Room was the scariest last year then I hope this seems ok to them.
I have done silhouettes a small amount in Factory but mostly, no. It looks like a good art form if you do it well.
Let me show you some REAL silhouettes.
http://coldhardflash.com/flash-animation-10-best-animated-insanely-twisted-shadow-puppets

Yay, fullbody :3
I disliked the sketchy style, but it seemed you worked harder than using just gradients, which was good! ^-^
The tweening was a bit lazy, at parts, since the arm that moved was unsynced with the walk.
Maybe add a bit more story, cause atm, Im just like :
o.o' He pulled out his heart? Lived? The heart became a plant? wahhhht? >.<

But yeah, if you continue it, I can't wait to see the finished outcome.
^-^' If I can help in anyway, PM me! :D
I like the sketchy style but I should clean it up a bit.
You realize that arm is broken, in half and swinging?
Did you also read that i plan on making the animation around 3 minutes? I don't plan on putting a 30 second clip onto newgrounds and expecting hundreds of dollars for it. XD
I can't wait for it to be done. Not because it's torture doing it (though it is rather time consuming), but because I know this will be my best project ever.
Thanks rabstar!

Ok, sorry for not being specific, About the graphics I dont really like that scratchy style and i think it could be alot better. Remember to use the biggest brush when your zoomed in and the tablets pressure settings to maximise the use of it, if that makes sense.

The clouds could be easily tweened to slowly move into the distance, maybe even distort them so the move like an upside down version of the famous star wars text scrolling, if you understand me.

and the big blood blip before he rips his heart out, it didnt really fit. Goodluck and i wish you the best. Maybe if the blood hit the screen and dribled down it. You could alpha tween it aswell.
Whenever my tablet has the biggest brush on, it always seems to randomly, even though I am pressing lightly, mid stroke just put a ball of the biggest size it can be on the screen and I have to erase it. Thanks to this I'm forced to do small lines, but I will clean up an amount of the scratchiness.

I know what you mean, but I have a very limited time frame here. I already tweened the clouds coming towards the viewer very slowly and gradually going up (and left on the second scene). It isn't perfect but the movement in the first place is barely noticable.

I think the blip fits in okay. I also don't want the audience to feel there's a camera in this sort of imaginary looking area. :}
Thanks, Vile.

STUFF
09-28-2009, 07:27 PM
I'm going to Tint the 2nd frame white, see how it looks, and tell you if I did it (edit: I'm keeping the effect. i think it looks better.), because it sounds like a good idea. I did it 3 frames because they're 3/20 of a second and I thought it's still an instant, just the shade with the spurt coming out of the figure would seem more apparent I thought. I'll see how your idea goes though.
Thanks. i was proud of the blood after I finished it. Flawed but I like how it looks.
The heart took me an hour. The reason it took me so long was because I kept re-doing it. I tried to get it to bounce for 45 minutes and thought I might have been spending a bit much time trying to make it bounce when at such a speed the heart could just 'splat' like a water balloon spitting out blood, but keeping it's structure because of the more strength I'd think a heart would have. I'll look at it again though.

Thanks. How many times did you watch it? Did you pause it and count the amount of blip frames there were or was it a lucky guess?

Thanks!
I plan on making it interesting. i'm working on my storyboard to see what i can do to it a lot. I realize at the beginning it's a tad slow moving and sort of boring, especially during the second viewing I asked you to go through. Do you think I should speed up these waits between actions or do you think the spacing helps the clarity you mentioned more than it takes away from the quality of the pace?
that's the second comment I've got about the clouds, I'm going to tween them. I thought it wouldn't be a problem but of all crit I get from the NG audience, that would be pretty big. Thanks, Stuff, you've helped a lot.

What makes the graphics kinda suck? Is it my scratchy style of drawing/shading that doesn't fit your taste or do you see technical problems? Elaborate please so I can take something from this. I do use a tablet though.

Did the blood not fit realistically or aesthetically? Do you mean the flowing blood or the blood-red colored blip before the pull-out?
Thank you for your input but I need some more details if you're willing to help.

The spacing's fine. The slowness at the beginning makes it seem like it's a really old 1930s silent movie, which adds to the gloominess that the animation gives off.

Kitsune
09-28-2009, 09:57 PM
I'm much rather too speechless to day anything but this <
Haha thanks.

Kitsune, I watched it a couple of times. Went through some parts frame by frame.
oh ok. thanks!

The spacing's fine. The slowness at the beginning makes it seem like it's a really old 1930s silent movie, which adds to the gloominess that the animation gives off.
Well I hope the music doesn't take away from the silent movie feel then. :D

Arch-Angel
09-29-2009, 10:28 AM
--after watching--

If you'd like to help me out please answer these questions:
k
Do you think I have a shot at placing in newgrounds Halloween if this is the beginning of a 3 minute feature? I have a whole storyboard and at this rate I think I can get a 3 minute done before then.
No. The quality of the artwork is not that good. I don't really like it. Try a different style of artwork. Perhaps something less complicated.
Did you find anything particularly disruptive to the quality of the movements?
Nope, the hand that is cut in half doesn't look right though. Sooooooo... Maybe it's the anatomy of it. The arms are too long in my opinion. Doesn't look right.
Did you see anything that you found to be wrong in any way concerning aesthetics or how it looks? Proportional problems?
One question higher. Arms are too long, and the figure looks too weak to rip his heart out.
Did you notice any lag while playing in any level of quality?
Nopes
If you watched it more than twice, how many times did you watch it?
Once :D I only state the things that I notice on the first view. Would you sit in a movie theatre and watch the same movie twice in a row (paying of course) just to find the errors? I use that principle when rating things. If it didn't really surprize me, then I won't watch it again. Unless you're desperate for criticism :/
Did you like it?
The artwork is bad, but if you add some cinimatics to it, and fix some of the iffy stuff up, then I think that you could make something really good out of this. Story line seems like it would be something relative to Halloween.
I've had comments about the reaction of the heart being pulled out not being 'dramatic' enough. Do you agree?
Yeah. Needs more force and blood.
Thank you if you took the time to read and answer.


Bold words are for serial, dawg.

Kitsune
09-29-2009, 11:53 AM
No. The quality of the artwork is not that good. I don't really like it. Try a different style of artwork. Perhaps something less complicated.

I'm going to fix up the scratchiness but I'm not going to change around my style. :/

Nope, the hand that is cut in half doesn't look right though. Sooooooo... Maybe it's the anatomy of it. The arms are too long in my opinion. Doesn't look right.

The arms are too long, I agree. I went wrong with measuring the scale of. I will resize them if I have the time after finishing them but right now I'm rushing to get this done.

Once :D I only state the things that I notice on the first view. Would you sit in a movie theatre and watch the same movie twice in a row (paying of course) just to find the errors? I use that principle when rating things. If it didn't really surprize me, then I won't watch it again. Unless you're desperate for criticism :/

I am desperate for criticism. I need more opinions than my own. Before these posts I thought it was pretty sufficient so far, but after review I'm going to clean up the scratchiness and rework some points. I want this to be as good as possible and hard criticism like the king you all gave me is the best way there.

The artwork is bad, but if you add some cinimatics to it, and fix some of the iffy stuff up, then I think that you could make something really good out of this. Story line seems like it would be something relative to Halloween.

I wouldn't call the artwork 'bad' but if you say so, sure. I'm planning and trying to make it more appealing and interesting. :]

Yeah. Needs more force and blood.

The character looks weak as you said before, doesn't he? So shouldn't his actions also be weak and less forceful?

kgbcha
10-01-2009, 03:25 PM
hey this is my first day on this what do i do

Kitsune
10-01-2009, 04:00 PM
What do you want to accomplish?

Arch-Angel
10-02-2009, 10:03 AM
No. The quality of the artwork is not that good. I don't really like it. Try a different style of artwork. Perhaps something less complicated.

I'm going to fix up the scratchiness but I'm not going to change around my style. :/

Nope, the hand that is cut in half doesn't look right though. Sooooooo... Maybe it's the anatomy of it. The arms are too long in my opinion. Doesn't look right.

The arms are too long, I agree. I went wrong with measuring the scale of. I will resize them if I have the time after finishing them but right now I'm rushing to get this done.

Once :D I only state the things that I notice on the first view. Would you sit in a movie theatre and watch the same movie twice in a row (paying of course) just to find the errors? I use that principle when rating things. If it didn't really surprize me, then I won't watch it again. Unless you're desperate for criticism :/

I am desperate for criticism. I need more opinions than my own. Before these posts I thought it was pretty sufficient so far, but after review I'm going to clean up the scratchiness and rework some points. I want this to be as good as possible and hard criticism like the king you all gave me is the best way there.

The artwork is bad, but if you add some cinimatics to it, and fix some of the iffy stuff up, then I think that you could make something really good out of this. Story line seems like it would be something relative to Halloween.

I wouldn't call the artwork 'bad' but if you say so, sure. I'm planning and trying to make it more appealing and interesting. :]

Yeah. Needs more force and blood.

The character looks weak as you said before, doesn't he? So shouldn't his actions also be weak and less forceful?

If the character is weak looking (Looks very weak), then how could he pull his heart out that easily? You should at least show some restraint (Weak people often struggle and feel pain easier, therefore they basically rethink what they're doing), maybe throw in a short clip of where his face expresses frustration. It just looks like he puts his hand on his chest, and then rips his heart out. Since he is weak, he will actually need more force to do something like that :D Quite the oposite of what you just said, if you ask me.

Kitsune
10-02-2009, 11:39 AM
If the character is weak looking (Looks very weak), then how could he pull his heart out that easily? You should at least show some restraint (Weak people often struggle and feel pain easier, therefore they basically rethink what they're doing), maybe throw in a short clip of where his face expresses frustration. It just looks like he puts his hand on his chest, and then rips his heart out. Since he is weak, he will actually need more force to do something like that :D Quite the oposite of what you just said, if you ask me.

This is all quite true. I'll add this to my editing list. Thank you!

Arch-Angel
10-02-2009, 02:23 PM
Good Luck with it.
Even if you don't make it by the deadline, you should still finish it.

Kitsune
10-02-2009, 02:29 PM
If I hurry I should make it by the deadline, and if its a piece of crap by the time I upload it I'll just finish it as a refined movie later. Why? because I'm liking my storyboard. :B

Arch-Angel
10-02-2009, 02:31 PM
Do I get benefits to look get a storyline PM'd to meh =D

Kitsune
10-02-2009, 02:36 PM
Sorray but it comes out the 28th and u can wait cant u? :D

Arch-Angel
10-02-2009, 04:59 PM
Or I can help you out with it D=
lol I'm pretty good at stuff like this. Your call.

Kitsune
10-02-2009, 05:44 PM
I think from the perspective of needing to get this in on time balanced with the thought of entertaining the audience with spooky things, I think I'm alright. Thank you though

Foda
10-02-2009, 05:47 PM
when ever i click on your videos i never now what to expect. i only know it is going to be dark.

Arch-Angel
10-02-2009, 05:52 PM
If you can entertain me with spooky stuff, or make me feel creeped out or scared in anyway, then you sir, are good.

lol This conversation and watching NG videos is making me want to work on my game. . .

Kitsune
10-02-2009, 06:04 PM
when ever i click on your videos i never now what to expect. i only know it is going to be dark.
Thanks. I wouldn't call my other videos like factory or twilight dark or anything. This one has an excuse too. It's for halloween. So no one can call me ****ed up for animating gore like I really want to. :D

If you can entertain me with spooky stuff, or make me feel creeped out or scared in anyway, then you sir, are good.

lol This conversation and watching NG videos is making me want to work on my game. . .
Well knowing your standards that will be a difficult task. :>

Do you have a game development thread I can view in the community originals section?

Arch-Angel
10-02-2009, 06:05 PM
I don't beleive I have any screen shots in the thread, but there's one in there. Theres about 3 or 5 about me looking fo rpeople though. You'll know it when you see it though.

Arch-Angel
10-02-2009, 06:08 PM
http://www.stickpageportal.com/forums/showthread.php?t=105866

Bongoe
10-02-2009, 06:08 PM
the way you shade is ugly as all hell, fix that. other than that very good. make more though.

Kitsune
10-02-2009, 06:14 PM
Thanks Bongoe!

I'm already 45 seconds in and this will be a 2.5 minute or so project after the necessary storyboard cuts I had to make. I'm also fixing the graphics on these guys once I have the time.

Kitsune
10-02-2009, 06:24 PM
http://www.stickpageportal.com/forums/showthread.php?t=105866

Looks awesome. Did you fix the drill on the second boss?

Want me to bummmmp it? :>

Arch-Angel
10-02-2009, 06:37 PM
If you want to.

And what do you mean? I haven't touched him lol

Kitsune
10-02-2009, 09:07 PM
The drill doesn't have the sharp drilly edges coming out of the side and the jutting out of them causes no extra shading or anything It looks flat in comparison to the rest of the boss' body. :/

Kitsune
10-03-2009, 06:59 PM
some other animation
http://www.truploader.com/view/407489
I thought I'd just put this in a thread thats made already. it doesnt deserve a thread.
I thought I'd just show off a little thing I made a few months ago because I never got to uploading or nearly 1/4 finishing it. It will never progrss. It's my 1st with the tablet I had gotten.

alcaknight
10-03-2009, 09:49 PM
Haha, nicely done. I like the wobbly look, even though you may not have been going for it. May I ask, why is there a ball covering his pelvic area?

eviltie
10-04-2009, 08:29 AM
Hm... that was interesting. Love the cinematics. Keep it up and good luck.

Kitsune
10-04-2009, 11:01 AM
Haha, nicely done. I like the wobbly look, even though you may not have been going for it. May I ask, why is there a ball covering his pelvic area?
Thank you.
I hate the wobbliness to be honest. I was using way too big of a brush. XD
You don't have to ask. I'll answer before you wask.
The bal's intention was to maintain torso width. I could have done it with a line but I don't know what I was thinking at the time.

Hm... that was interesting. Love the cinematics. Keep it up and good luck.

thanks. :>

Spooned
10-11-2009, 01:43 AM
Look, to be completely honest, I loved the way you animated it. The style was unique, because it was dirty and gritty. Not all flash animations have to be pristine fresh, smooth, clean, perfect and absolutely 100% user-friendly, and I believe you have established the surreal effect really well. I say with "artistic" animations like this you should give yourself more room for creative spontaneity, because trying to make it too perfect will spoil the creepiness of it. Keep it up and I will offer my first daughter to be married to you.