View Full Version : Story: "Hell

03-07-2012, 12:58 PM
(This is a story that I wrote a really long time ago so the impact may not be up to par. I'm going to try and tweak around somethings later but please leave your comments and critiques if you so desire.)

Hell's Fire

Chapter 1: "Fear and Courage"

“Courage,” I thought to myself as I listened to the squeals and laughter of children as I lay under the cool shade of the community park oak tree. I let out a sigh of frustration as I turned to my side trying to relax and enjoy the cool canopy, but my relaxation was interrupted by a sudden splash of liquid in my face and lots of high pitched giggling.

“Grrr, you did it now!” I roar playfully as I chase the kids around the giant oak tree.

“You can’t catch us! You can’t catch us!” Chanted Leon and Leal as they jumped over the roots with big mischievous grins spread across their faces.

“We’ll see about that!” I say as I lunge forward and grab them both by their ankles lifting them both up as they make faces at me. “Hahaha! Looks like I caught ya!” I laugh bending my head backwards unaware of the stick Leon had picked up as he swung like a pro towards my manhood. I dropped both of them and collapsed to my knees in agonizing pain trying not to curse in front of my nephews.

“Looks like we win Uncle Ren!” Says Leon pointing his wooden baton in my direction.

“Together we have the strength and the courage to defeat anything!” Says Leal as he stands proudly next to his brother.

Taking this advantage I quickly stanch the stick away from Leon and grab them both their ears and pull them closer to my face as they yelp in pain. “Ho? So you think that you’ve won by playing dirty huh?” I say completely unamused of their foul play.

Suddenly a hard object struck me in the back of my head and I tremble at the sound of an angry troll behind me, “And what do you think you are doing to my kids?”

I slowly turn my head reminiscing of the time I last heard the roar of an angry troll. “I was just playing with them and teaching them abou-” This time a very powerful force strikes me on the side of my face as I fly a good 3-4 feet or so.

“Nice to see you again Triss!” I smile as I massage my jaw wondering how it had not been dislodged or rather ripped out of my skull from that inhuman strength.

Checking her wrist and fixing her suit, Triss walked over to me and stamped the heel of her stiletto to my chest. It had been 15 years since I last saw that primped attitude and neatly pressed suit adorned with those librarian styled glasses. She was a young lawyer who was happily married and quickly divorced by a man whom she dearly loved, and I must say the only man who dared venture into opening the heart of a demon only to get his ass thrown into jail for child endangerment and his greed for money. Never endanger the lives of the cubs for money; you’ll only come home to an angry mama bear. “Ren,” she replied pursing those ruby red lips removing her foot from my chest.

Lightly coughing and brushing myself off, I rubbed the part of my head that was most certainly swelling by now. “Geez you still hit like a gorilla.” I joke teasingly while ducking under another deadly fist to my jaw and quickly backing off raising both of my hands. “But I guess you didn’t call me here just so I can be your punching bag. What can I do for ya?”

Triss’ glasses flashed as she touched the edge of it pushing it back into place, “I have a job for you since I know that you like taking apart and piecing together the minds of people,” she said as she reached into her purse and handed me a manila envelope. “This man was suspected in a case of mine and I need you to tell me how he thinks to determine some facts for me.”

“Was?” I raise an eyebrow, "Was he get let go from the case?"

“He was taken in for questioning but he kept saying that someone would kill him if he said anything. So one night, while the guards weren’t looking, he killed himself before he could spit out any useful information. He left those audiotapes as the only evidence before he died.” I pull out bags each one holding an audiotape in it and one holding the video recorder.

“Have you listened to them yet?” I ask looking up at her with a more serious face only to be replied with a scowl as she readjusted her glasses again. Memories of my last case appeared in my mind as I gnawed on the bottom of my lip. Things, as one could imagine, never work out exactly as one plans all the time. My case in particular ended in a failure as everything pointed to the suspect to being guilty while the real criminal skipped out of my hands. The loss of my job, the pain of knowing I had incriminated the wrong person while the other had successfully ran away, and my pride as a detective had burned down along with my apartment that night. Apparently, popularity also receives the many who quickly jump at one's first big mistake, especially when it involves international crisis.

I rubbed my forehead trying to ease the pain that had now accumulated into a headache. “Triss, you know I quit the detective games a long time ago. Why bring this to me?”

“You know as well as I do Ren the reason why I brought this to you and you only, I will be waiting at the address inside the envelope,” she scowled as she turned around and walked away with Leon and Leal following her.

Being left with just a manila envelope and a couple of tapes left me wondering what could be running through her mind and why all the secrecy? Something seemed strange about it all but I shook it off as I pulled out one of the tapes and popped it into the tape recorder.

Lots of shuffling noises and scratchy sounds came from the recorder taking about a full 5 minutes before I heard anything resembling a voice.

Hello? Is this thing working?

Log 1: “Fear”

I’ve been captured and am being held for questioning today. HA! I bet they think that I had little helpers that have gone into hiding or that I have been working for some kind of underground society hehehe. My guards say that I’m a despicable SOB and that I should be afraid of the interrogations that are coming ahead, but I wonder they lock me up here? Why should I be afraid? I assume they are more afraid of me as I can hear the shaking of their guns even from my cell, my cozy little stone room with no windows and only a flickering light bulb to illuminate my soul. I talked to one of the guards outside my cell today, apparently I murdered his wife and he spites me for that. Hohoho I remember that kill it was especially delicious – Click!

I pause the tape and take a moment to think as I lay back under the oak tree. This man seemed to be either simply insane or incredibly intuitive at playing mind games. It seems he was just playing with the lives of those he held in his hands as if they were new toys and he was a destructive little toddler. Pressing play again and hitting fast-forward to skip most of the ridiculous banter I stop somewhere in the middle of the tape.

Log 2: “Observance”

They took me in and tortured me today, or should I say played with me. The woman that was there, I think her name was Triss…

Hearing my sister’s name alerted me as I sat upright listening intently.

Anyways, she was quite the looker ehehhee, but completely uptight like a white man’s clenched buttocks or so I told her. She may look like a beauty but she hits like an ox! Such an interesting woman indeed, but I digress. Those fools think they have me captured, but this cell is nothing! I could simply leave whenever I choose but I am quite comfortable at the moment. These men claim that they are men of valor and of great courage for catching a man such as I. IT FUCKING PISSES ME OFF!!!

Completely startled by his shouting I nearly drop the recorder as I quickly catch it and hold it up to my ear as his voice grew quite again.

These fools! I’ll definitely slit their throats later… But back to what I was saying before that woman, she makes me squirm with excitement! OH! Maybe she will be next toy to play with.

This was no ordinary man; everything in me screamed out that this man was way above the normal caution level. Quickly pulling out my cell, I thumbed my sister’s number and put the phone up to my ear.

The phone rang 3 times before someone picked it up, “Hello? Triss, are you there?”

“Yea, I’m here Ren. What do you want? Did you figure out anything yet?” she replied with a slightly annoyed tone in her voice.

“No I haven’t found out anything yet, but listen he is no ordinary criminal that can be locked up in a normal jail cell, that is for sure. Are you sure that the dead body was the man?” Flipping through some of the documents I pulled out some showing a full report on the man. A cold chill went down my spine and I became more and more worried for my sister as I read through his profile.

“Gerald Hume. Charged with 1st murder and arson. Killed 5 women and had a trend of burning their bodies after raping them and choking them to death. Similar specifics between the victims was the fact that they all had the same occupation as lawyers or other miscellaneous jobs of the law.”

“Look we confirmed his DNA through the blood on the body and on the floor he is dead as your brain apparently. Just get over her wh–” Triss’ voice was replaced by the sudden sound of muffled screams and a deep crackling voice boomed into my ears.

“Come down to claim your reward Ren, I’m sure we’ll both get a strange laugh of surprise!” An unfamiliar rage filled me as I shouted threat after threat into the phone as the cackling laughter echoed through the phone ending with a deafening click.

Running as fast as I could down to Triss’ house I quickly prime my 9mm Browning pistol and kick open the door. Quickly checking the living room I slowly work my way around the corner into the dining room seeing a plain white note folded in the seat in front of me as I checked the corners of the room. Stowing my gun away, I picked up the note and slowly opened it. Confusion and fear followed me as I read the note quickly turning around and feeling a dull thud on the side of my head followed by blackness.

A swelling pain greeted me as I finally came to, “Ah, your awake! Good, now we can finally get down to business. Sorry about the ropes, I couldn’t take my chances as I knew you would be hasty in killing me.”

Looking up around the room I realized that I was in a small room set up like an interrogation scene in those crimes shows I watched on TV. “Where are Triss and the kids?” I growled as I tried to see if I could loosen the ropes that held me down to my chair.

“They’re fine for now, but they’re kind of lost!” He cackled as he pointed towards a strange doorway that seemed to shift like water in the back of the room.

“What the hell is that?”

“It’s a land where the dead roam, but all you need to know is that they are safe for now.”

None of this made sense but I went along with his crazy rambling, “What do you want?”

“Me? All I want is to have a little fun! But if you want to see your family again you are going to have to play with me first,” he grinned as he pulled out my pistol and untied me.

I quickly grab my pistol and smack the side of the man’s head with the butt of it as I straddle him and shove the nose of the gun into the man’s chin. “Tell me where they are now, or so help me I’ll blow your fucking brains out!!”

Gerald laughed manically, “I’ve already told you they’re in that portal!”

Getting off of him and striding into the portal I suddenly get thrown backwards as if a pro football player had tackled me. “What the hell?”

“I’ve told you Ren, death is the only way to enter the Dead Lands through normal means my friend. And I’m the only man in the world who can help you!” Gerald stretched out his arms as he chanted towards the ceiling. “THIS IS THE WAY LIFE WORKS BUT TO CHEAT DEATH ONE NEEDS BUT TO EMBRACE ITS TOUCH!!!”

I quickly scrambled to my feet and point my gun at him. "Where is my family?"

"Oh Ren, how many times must I hint to you these things?" Gerald to a dramatic pause as his small pupils looked off into the distance before slowly falling on me. "They're dead!" As he pulled back a curtain showing the lifeless bodies that hung behind him.

The lifeless bodies of my sister and the children hung there before me like bloodied rags. The multiple cuts, the blackened bruises, and the blood that dripped from their feet into the dark red pool below them vividly plastered the image into my mind.

"If you'd like, I could tell you what their last moments were like. They screamed in agony as I-" Gerald's head whipped backwards as I unloaded the bullets into his skull. I couldn't hear the sounds that came from my mouth, or describe if they were even forming words beyond the sound of my gunfire.

It took me awhile to realize that my gun was empty as I backed into a wall and slid down to the floor. The emptiness began to form inside of me as stared at the corpse on the ground before me. I didn't know what to do now, my head felt empty and the hole in my heart ached now more than ever realizing that I was alone again.

"Aw, is the poor former detective lonely?"

A cold shiver struck me as I jumped half way up the wall before being slammed against it by an unforeseen force. "W-what the?"

Gerald's fingers twitched as they slowly began to push him upwards exposing the gruesome mess of what had been his head. "So detective, are you willing to play my game now?" he said before wrenching the pistol from my hand and pointing it to my head. "Or shall I help you?"

Nothing made sense, but it was strange. I felt no fear staring at the hanging jaw, missing eye, and leaking brains that hung in front of his face. I spat in his face, "Go fuck yourself."

"Alright then detective, I'll see you in hell. Have a nice trip!"

In a moment, the world turned from light to dark and everything around me felt numb as the last moments of life drifted into sleep.

Chapter 2 -------(Still researching things for chapter 2)