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View Full Version : Cowboy bodacious (bodacious) vs Lobotomizer (Kalena



cowboy bodacious
12-21-2012, 06:17 AM
Ok i knew this would be a onesided fight when i challanged Lobotomizer but I wanted to see how i stacked up. Lobotomizer will post later.

I entered the wRHG office to find out my next fight. "So miss, who shall I be fighting this time? " "Oh dear, it looks like Kalena is you next fighter" the normally cheerful expression towards me turned to worry as she read the screen and reported to me. I gulped down a bit of fear in my throat. I had just watched this woman fight the day before. She fought with honor, ferocity; and a scence of justice that while the intensions were good, the ends just didn't justify the means in some cases. I was raised to be a true southern gentleman and to hit a lady was against everything I was taught and believed in. "Well I knew this day would come, mom please forgive me for what I will be doing later on" I sighed to myself.

"Whats wrong master? You seem a bit down, not like your normal self" Anies asked of me. "You can read my thoughts you should know." "Yes but it is still polite to ask, it would be best for you to talk about it" she said in her usual caring manner. She was right, I needed to let it out so I could relax. "Well I was raised to never hit a lady, it goes agaisnt my southern upbringing. I....I just don't know if i can do this." "All you can do is defend yourself. From what we witnessed with our friend and her she will not hold back." Anies tried to reassure me that there was a way to get around the no hitting policy. "Yea your right," my voice picked back up to its perky, upbeat tone, " If she attacks first then it would be self deffence like Sebastian!"

I left a note on her apartment door to meet me on a desolate stretch of road outside of town to keep from others being hurt and left 2 mustanges ouside to wait for her and bring them to the meeting point. Sebastain came with me, he wanted to watch the fight since I kept him from killing her last time. I think he wanted to appologize as well. I knew I might need backup as well, incase she saw the evil in me and tried to kill me so it was a relief fo have him as help. Along with him I was riding my mare pearl and Sebastain on a 7 year old mustange I befriended in the when first arrived to Stick Page City.

It was about 3pm when they finally arrived, "I hope your ride was enjoyable." "Yes it was, I must say I have never seen such well behaved stallion mustanges before, you must be quite the trainer" she said with the slight bit of suprise in her voice. "Well ma'am I pride myself on my ability to train and communicate with animals, call it a special bond I share with them." Corvon looked nervously around, he was visibly scared by the fact I brought Sebastain with me "Let us skip the plesentries," Kalena's face grew emotionless, "but first tell me why have you joined this system that pits others to fights to most often death? What are you in it for, money, fame, power, blood lust?" I lowered my head with a slight sigh, I thought deeply for a moment.

That question had been answered several times of me already and I gave the same responce everytime. But recently it has changed a little, "I entered this system originally just because I love the thrill of a good fight, not killing mind you, just the battle between 2 wills to see who is stronger. But, recently I have a new reason, you see I made a promise to Sebatian here," I nodded at him, "to keep his inner demon in check. I am as loyal as anyone to those I care about, 2 legged or otherwise, and when I make a promise I intend to keep it." She looked at me with contempt, "But what if you take it too far one day? What if you try to kill someone?" "Ma'am I only kill those who try to kill others and there is no other way to stop them."

She frowned scorfully at me, "I have read your profile, it says you will be headed to your nation's army; how shall you keep your promise to your friend to keep him in check?" She raised an eyebrown to indicate she had her douts. "Well you see I have already figured it out, untill I return my rope will stay with sebastain. Much like it did before when it saved your life, if Dacilus ever gets loose the rope will immobalize and supress him." I looked back at Sebastain, he smiled. He was eternally grateful for what I have done for him.

"I may ask the same for you, why have you joined such a dangerous organization?" Kalena closed her eyes and spoke, "I have come to destroy this vial game of life and death. It sickens me to see this city pit human beings against eachother for pure entertainment." She opend her eyes, each one shining with a a passion that matched her words "And I will say I have never met someone with a motive so strange but, you shall leave or I will force you to!"

In a brazen dash she quickly closed the gap between us. She made a quick slash downward to slice me in half, it was to quick to dodge but I had managed to lower my head into the path of the swing.

The sword bounced off the top of my hat as if it had hit solid steel. Kalena was bewildered, "How, how can this be? What scorcery is this? No hat should be able to withstand even a normal sword no less the sword of truth!"

"Sorry ma'am I can't even explain it, I found the cloth in a field and had it made into my hat and thats all I know." Her face turned sturn again as she closed the distance once again. I grabbed my hat off my head and weilded it as a shield. With each slice bouncing off the hat, Kalena became more and more frustrated.

Suddenly she pulled back and stabbed her sword into the ground. I was about to ask why she had when the ground began to shake. Thinking it was an earthquake I dove to the ground, big mistake. As soon I touched down a pillar of earth shot straight up into my stomach knocking all the breath out of me and sent me flying upward.

I fell back to the ground gasping for air. Before I knew what happened more earth envoloped my entire body trapping me there. I had been caught totally off guard and now was a sitting duck.
Kalena removed her sword and turned toward Sebastian. "Now while he is stuck there me and you have unfinished business, you must leave the system or I will cut you down."

I watched as Kalena did her best to slash away at Sebastain as he tried to dodge, but I could see he couldn't for much longer he was in sever pain from their previous fight. Then as he tripped she managed to land a large gash to his leg.

Sebastian could no longer move; Kalena went for the kill but was thrown off balance when the very earth itself shook. As she fell to the ground as saw what had so vilently caused the very ground to shake.

It was me; I was horrified that she had went after my friend after having subdued me. I let the evil inside out. A surge of power tore through my body as I gave everything I had to break open the earthen cacoon I was entrapped in. I erupted up sended rocks hurteling everywhere.

I looked at her with a burning hatred and said in a low deep vioce, "I told you I am loyal to my friends, so you think I would just sit idly by and watch you murder him infront of me?" Kalena was in shock, "So you are not the nice person you claim to be, you are a demon is disguise! I shall cleanse this earth of your essence!"

Kalena unleashed a barrage of perfectly time slashes keeping me pushing back and back. There was no opening to take advantage of, no mistake in her exicution.

I ducked under a horizontal slash and realised I had my chance. I had Anies grab her by the foot and trip her. As she fell back I used the other end of my lasso to knock the sword loose. Before she could pick it back I grabbed it up and sunk it into a rock to the hilt, but didn't let go.

I picked the sword up rock and all and held it above Kalena's head. "I do not wish to harm you, and I am no demon. I was given this power by God to transform it into pure good through contact with my pure heart. Please quit now before I really have to hurt you." She whispered something to herself.

A siering pain shot through my leg as a bright light shot through my leg like a sword. I dropped the sword and boulder and grabbed my leg. Kalena stood up and looked over me, "I know you speak the truth, for those who wield that sword are bound to truth itself, but I am bound by my word to purge this world of this barbaric entertainment!"

She uttered that weird phrase again and the same light that pierced my leg shown again and sliced the rock in half. She picked up he sword and turned to face me once more. I rose up in pain hobbling on one leg. "I am like you, bound to my word. I promised to keep Dacilus in check and I will keep it no matter what!"

We dashed at eachother one final time and in a blur of dust we clashed. We landed on the backside of eachother not knowing who landed their blows sucsessfully. My right arm opened up into a nasty gash down the length of my bicep, but I was not alone. Kalena fell to the ground from the blow to the stomach I landed as we traded attacks.

Corvon who had been standing speachless this whole time rushed to his companion and began to treat her with what looked like magic. I fell to my knees in horrible pain, I was loosing blood bad and the evil inside had recceded. the last thing i rememebr is Sebastain rushing to me as I blacked out.

I awoke in the apartment Sebastain lived in. I looked down and saw my arm was bandadged up and so was my leg and Sebastian's. "So what happened to Kalena?" "I am fine" Kalena spoke up, nearly making me shit my pants. i tried to get up to i was far too sore to move. "Rest, I do not wish to fight you anymore. You have shown me that there is good in this system. I am impressed my your dedication to you friend so I have stopped trying to force the both of you out. I will simply try to force the others out instead." she said with a slight smile. "Well I must say that was one hell of a fight. You are truely dadicated to your mission and i hope you do succed. And if you ever get in a tough spot, just holler and I will come running." With that i passed out again with a big smile on my face.

Lobotomizer
12-21-2012, 10:54 AM
Perhaps it is my fate.

To only look at her back, watching her fight for her ideal.

Helplessly watching her kill, watching her get injured.

At times I wanted to stop her, tell her that no matter how noble her intention was, there were lines that simply cannot be crossed.

“The end never justifies the means”, was what I thought.

But no matter how, I could not convey this to her. I could not bring myself to.

I can only hope, with all my heart, that she would realise this someday.



“Wakey wakey, mister sleepy.”

Corvon frowned in his sleep, his eyelids shut tighter as bright light shone on his face. Yet despite the disturbance, he was still quite asleep.

“Oh come on, you lazy little...”

All of a sudden, he was rudely awakened as his body was violently shaken by a pair of rough hands. His head lolled back and forth on his shoulders, jarring his mind with a splitting headache.

“Stop!” He cried out, confused and disoriented. The shaking stopped, which gave him an opportunity to open his eyelids and view his surroundings. Right in front of him was Jeff, staring at him with bored eyes. He seemed worse for wear, if it was possible to call him that. His clothes, cloak and all, were in the same condition as before, but his features were a whole different matter. Eyebags had formed, and his hair more in a mess than ever.

“Jeff?” He uttered, somewhat taken aback by the change in his appearance.

“Yes, I’m glad you remember my name, something I’d expect considering I’m your driver,” he muttered, and pulled Corvon out of the car, “come on, out you go!”

Corvon had no time to even protest as he was brought out, but even as he was about to complain, his attention was drawn in by the change in the surroundings. They were no longer in the little-maintained dirt road, but next to a real, tarmac road that was the norm in most of the urban land. Where Jeff had parked the vehicle in what seemed to be a wide, sheltered building. Vehicles came to and fro, as did people.

“A...filling station?” He guessed.

“Bingo,” Jeff snapped his fingers, “you’re a genius. We’re in the main roads now. Just as well, because I was about to run out of fuel.”

“Run out of fuel?” Corvon thought back to Jeff’s words. He had slept for at least an hour, perhaps two. Yet they are at a filling station, when they should have arrived at their destination, “are we not headed for our destination?”

Jeff hesitated for a moment, “yeah well, the road was blocked off. Trees falling over and such from the rain not too long ago, so we have to go on a detour. A really long one.”

He stuck a thumb at the store in the station, “anyway, we’ll be staying here for a little while. You can buy food and drink if you want from that store. Once I’m done with what I have to say anyway.”

Corvon frowned,” What you have to say?”

Jeff pulled him close, till Corvon could almost smell his minty breath, “Here’s a word of advice. If you want something done, you go out and do it. Life doesn’t give handouts; hoping gets you nothing. Got it?”

Corvon was shaken by the sudden warning. He would have thought it a joke, had he not seen the look in Jeff’s eyes. They were cold and hard, resembling nothing of the normally cheerful and jesting nature of the man. He knew not what Jeff was referring to, but he understood that those words were something he had to keep in mind. And so he nodded in acknowledgement, which made Jeff’s eyes soften somewhat.

“Good. Now be off. Kalena has the cash, so go to her if you want to buy anything. I’ll be in the car, taking a short nap.”

Corvon watched Jeff withdraw into the rustic vehicle, then realised why he was in such a condition. Perhaps close to six hours had elapsed, and throughout that time he had been driving, while both Corvon and Kalena had fallen asleep. Silently he thanked Jeff for holding out for so long, before leaving for the store.

A blast of wind assaulted Corvon as he stepped into the store, stinging his face with its cold. At first he had thought the world had it’s own magic, before calming himself when he realised that it was simply the air conditioning. The interior of the store was fairly small, but nonetheless was filled with shelves stocked a variety of goods, most being food. A few people were present, but otherwise it was relatively empty and quiet, something which he had grown used to. He found Kalena a few shelves away, fiddling with a few packagings.

“Kalena?”

She turned at his call, then acknowledged his presence, “Corvon.”

He approached her and peered at the package in her hands. “VARIETHOR’S FINEST: CUP NOODLE / ALPACA DELIGHT”

“Prepared and preserved food seems to be the norm,” Kalena noted, placing the bowl-like product back on its shelf, “how interesting.”

“You seem little perturbed by the new environment,” Corvon commented, something which had been on his mind for quite some time. Kalena never seemed to give more than a fleeting glance at things that were new to the both of them, which was odd considering that, unlike he, she had made no effort in learning about the various machines and such. It was as if she was used to everything in this world, even though she was seeing them for the first time.

“I believe that if I simply do not think of how objects of this world work, I would need not waste time fretting over them,” she answered simply.

“Ah,” Corvon nodded. He had to admit, it was a good way of thinking, though not something he recommended.

“And?” Kalena tilted her head towards him questioningly, “how is Jeff? I was beginning to fear for his fatigue, considering how long he had driven for.”

“He is...fine, I suppose. He did say he was going to take a rest, though for how long I do not know,” he answered.

She hummed, but said nothing, instead examining another package of food. This time it read “FAMOUS LAMERS FABULOUS CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES”. A grotesque man’s face was printed above the lettering, showing a wide, toothy grin.

“He seems to be a good man,” she finally spoke.

“He is,” Corvon agreed.

They spent the next moments in silence, looking at the various products that lined the shelves. Corvon wondered just how people could make up their minds in facing so many choices, many of which are almost similar to each other, save for the manufacturer. He glanced at Kalena briefly, wondering what she was thinking at the moment. Had he ever known what was going through her mind? He doubted it. No one could.

“Kalena?”

“Hm?” She answered, though her eyes were still fixated on a packet of cookies.

“What...do you think of me?” He mustered himself to ask. It was a stupid question, but he just felt he needed to know. They had spent much time together, surely she thought more of him than just a companion?

She did not answer immediately, slowly placing the cookies back on their shelf before turning to him, “why do you wish to know?”

His mouth opened, then shut again when he realised he could not think of an answer. “Just...curious, is all,” he finally replied, albeit a little hesitantly.

“I think of you as a friend, a confidant. A person I can trust and rely upon,” she answered unblinkingly.

“I...see,” Corvon nodded, feeling a little disappointed. He stopped. What was he disappointed for? Surely he hadn’t been wishing for her to fall in love with him? Her answer was a good enough one, yet he could not help but feel that something was lacking.

“You think of me as a confidant, yet I know little about you,” he half joked, then sooner wished he hadn’t.

“There is little for you to know,” Kalena shook her head slowly.

“How can that be?” he returned, “even now I cannot fathom what you might possibly be thinking at any time.”

“Then tell me what you wish to know,” she said, “for I cannot think of anything to tell you.”

For a moment he hesitated, but he had come so far, he might as well continue, “why...did you kill Sebastian?”

“Sebastian,” she repeated the name, as if she were unfamiliar with it, “that man who housed a demon, was it?”

“Yes.”

“What other reason would there be to smite him, other than his being a murderer?”

“He did not murder intentionally!” Corvon argued, “should he be punished with death simply because of his fate?”

“Should the lives of innocents be risked for the sake of one man?” she countered, which made him fall silent immediately, “regardless of your thoughts, you cannot deny that letting him live would cause countless of others to die.”

“That is true but...Sebastian did not deserve that!” He half shouted, annoyed that she could not see it his way.

“Deserve what?”

The two turned at the voice, to see a young man walk towards them, curiosity clearly etched in his expression.

“This conversation is not of your concern,” Kalena replied cooly, “please leave.”

“Ah, I apologize,” he said pleasantly, unfazed by her words, “my name is Bodacious. You see, I had a friend of the same name, and I was wondering if you were, say, acquainted, with him?”

“I am sure there are plenty others of the same name,” Corvon answered, “perhaps you are mistaken.”

He hadn’t acknowledged it then, but he felt a tingling sense of dread. A sense of dread all too familiar to him. Might it be...?

“That is why I want to make sure,” he replied, “blond hair? Slim build? Somewhat big eyes and thin nose? He’s about my height, does it resemble the Sebastian you met?”

Corvon's emotionless expression belied his thoughts. His mind was thrown into turmoil by those words. Of course, this had to happen. They had to meet a friend of one Kalena had slain.

He was about to deny having ever met the man. He only had to apologize, say he knew nothing. They'd be on their seperate ways after that, with no need of conflict. But before he could even open his mouth to speak, Kalena spoke up.

"I believe we have met him. And by my hand did I fell the man," She said.

Kalena! He gave her a panicked glance, but she made no notice. Why did she reveal it? She was bound to the truth, but she could have hid the fact of his death all the same, or not have spoken at all. So why...?

Bodacious, however, seemed misunderstand her words, "I'm sorry, "fell"? You fell for him?"

"No, I killed him," she replied bluntly.

At that moment, Corvon felt the urge to scream. They were done for. There was no recourse after what she had said. It would lead to another fight, ending with the death with either person, neither of which he had wanted to happen in the slightest.

Unsurprisingly, Bodacious's first response was of disbelief, "this is a joke? Right?" He asked, still smiling.

"I only tell the truth," she answered simply.

"You killed him."

"I did, yes."

The next response then was that of anger. "He was a friend. My friend," he uttered through gritted teeth. His fists were clenched and trembling in rage, and it was just about all he could do to punch a hole through this woman. Killed? How could she?

"As he was a demon. I would not risk countless of other lives for the sake of sparing one man," she replied emotionlessly. If she had noticed the man's anger, she showed no knowledge of it. It was almost as if she were provoking him.

"Demon? That's not possible. I gave him my rope to stop that!" He half shouted.

"Whatever it is that you did, it failed to work," she said, giving no regard to the man's outburst., "his demon was able to surface from within him. I cut down the two to ensure it would never happen again."

Bodacious fell silent, hanging his head low. Corvon watched him nervously. What would the man do? Break down? Attempt to strike Kalena down from where she stood?

"Why did you tell him?" He hissed in Kalena's ears. More than ever he blamed her for revealing the news so casually, as if it meant nothing to her in the slightest.

"Why should I do otherwise?" She countered, "so that he may walk out thinking that his friend was safe, only to realise later that he had been lied to?"

Corvon made no reply. He could not. And he would not be able to think of a reply, for it was then that Badacious regained his composure, though still visibly shaken by the news.

"It's wrong of him to have let daicilus out, but it's even more wrong to have killed him for that," Bodacious shook his head slowly, then stared straight at Kalena, his eyes filled with determination and anger. So intense were those emotions that Corvon felt as if they had taken the form of an aura around the man, "I will fight you. A death match for my friend that you have slaughtered."

Kalena met his gaze evenly, "so be it."

"There's flat land not far from here behind the gas station. We'll fight there," with those words, he turned and stormed out, his anger could be felt even when he had left.

"Kalena!" Corvon exclaimed, "do you know what you've done? Why did you tell him? Why must you have it lead to this?"

"I have answered that," she replied coolly, "Knowing the truth is better than not. It is his decision to resolve it through battle, and my obligation to honor his wish."

"What wish?" He cried out, "the wish to kill? Die?"

Kalena made no reply, only turning to leave the store to follow Bodacious. Corvon felt his knees grow weak, and it was all he could do to keep himself from collapsing.

"Why...?" He murmured, but knew noone would be there to answer that very question. He could only hope.

And hope.

++++++++++++

The night wind blew at Kalena’s face, almost in a mournful fashion as she followed closely behind Bodacious. Neither spoke to the other as they walked toward the determined battlefield.

A rumble from the skies. Kalena looked up, to feel a drop of water hit her forehead. Then more came, till the two were drenched from the pouring rain. Winds howled, and thunder bellowed, as if the very heavens were displaying their intense anger. She gazed at the dark clouds with a dazed expression, and a small smile gradually formed on her lips. It was almost fitting, the rain. A setting all too appropriate for such a battle.

They stopped when they had reached the middle of the waterlogged field, about as wide as the gas station itself. Bodacious spun around and immediately crouched into a stance, baring his bare fists at his enemy.

“Bring out your sword,” he demanded. She did as he ordered.

The battle happened right then. Bodacious flung himself at Kalena, his fist pulled back for a punch at her abdomen. With no time to strike back, she instinctively turned and held the flat of her blade by her side, letting the attack land squarely against her sword. She winced as the force of the blow jarred her arm numb, pulling back before he could attempt another strike. Even with fists he showed monstrous strength unlike those she had fought before. Perhaps if she hadn’t blocked that attack, she might’ve simply fallen from that one hit.

He watched her go, but did not pursue, satisfied that she acknowledged his strength.

“I suppose you understand now,” he said, a slight smirk forming on his face, “you’re not the only one who was able to beat Daicilus.”

She made no reply, taking the time to steady her breathing. At the very least, he was slow enough to cut down; a much easier opponent than the demon from before. She put her sword low by her feet, waiting for the attack that would come next. It came went Bodacious charged at her once more. A predictable jab that she swiftly avoided, returning with a straight cut upward. He abandoned his offense then, jumping back to avoid the slash that would have took his arm.

“Guess I can’t let you do that,” he murmured, though his words were blown away by the torrential rain. Kalena watched him motion to take the hat off his head, wielding it in his left hand as if it were a buckler. Normal people would have dismissed it as an act of insanity; she played safe with the assumption that he now had a shield. A shield that could potentially deflect her attacks.

Once again bodacious was the first to strike, closing the distance between them with a single stride. Kalena jumped back before he could even land a hit, thrusting her blade ahead of her in a quick counterattack that grazed his side. It did nothing to stop his advancement, however, for he continued onward with his attacks. The exchanges continued, each never receiving more than a shallow graze. But by then Kalena had realised something. Smart as he was to alternate his attacks, it was clear to her that his aim was her sword arm. Most were quick jabs that aimed at her arm or shoulder, likely in the hopes that a blow would be enough to disarm her.

She started to keep her distance, only throwing out counterattacks sparingly, and even those were augmented more for speed than accuracy. The result was that she was backed to a corner, forced to only defend against Bodacious’ unrelenting strikes. Too cautious to attack, yet her defense could only last so long. Her enemy gave no sign of fatigue, but she could gradually feel her arms numbing from the repeated impacts. She was losing this battle of attrition.

But it wasn’t the time to curse herself for her cautiousness. She changed her stance, instead inviting his attacks instead of outright attempting to dodge them. Bodacious noticed the change immediately, but did nothing to adjust to it, running straight into the bait she had beckoned him with, his attacks unchanged...

...Or so it seemed. While she had outright attempted to cut his striking arm, he did a half turn in the middle of his step, almost impossible were it not for the muddy terrain, catching her blade with his own hat. Kalena’s eyes widened in an expression of horror and surprise. Of course, a hat is no buckler; it is flexible, after all. And the next that would come... was a riposte, or counter attack.

Almost as if on cue, Bodacious threw a punch in her abdomen, before following it up with a turning kick that sent her sprawling into the mud.

“You blocked it,’ he noted, watching her recover from the ground. Even as she was the very opponent he had intended to crush, he could not help but feel just a slight bit of respect. She had abandoned her weapon at the last second, choosing free her arm to defend against both his strikes which would have otherwise disabled her had she took them straight on. He glanced at the sword he had taken from her, and tossed it away, letting it fall to a puddle with an ominous splash. Perhaps this was why even Daicilus himself was defeated by her. “Abandoning your own weapon, you’ve got guts,” he narrowed his eyes at the swordswoman.

“‘Treat thine sword as an extension of one own’s arm, but thine flesh and blood are far more important than even the sharpest of blades’,” Kalena recited in response, “I would have been disarmed either way. Why pay the full price?”

“Then you’ve only felt a portion of what Sebastian had,” Bodacious said simply.

She made no reply, instead breaking to a sprint for where her sword had fallen. Even as the darkness made seeing her weapon impossible, hearing it hit the mud amidst the roar of the thunderstorm was good enough to tell her its exact location.

And in doing so, she broke the essential rule in battle that no one would think to cross: to never turn one’s attention from his opponent. It wasn’t a decision made lightly. After all, it was the only option she had; using her sheath or fists would be impossible against a man of improbable strength. In other words, he would be a near insurmountable opponent without her blade. She had taken their distance into account too; if Bodacious chose to pursue her, she had ample time to prepare. Nothing was lost yet. There was still hope.

That ended when a giant roar rang out from where Bodacious stood, as loud in volume as the raging thunder in the skies. And at the same time, she felt a sharp pain shoot through her left thigh. It was all she could do to stop herself from screaming in agony as she fell to the ground once more. She turned her head, just enough to be able to see Bodacious, his position unchanged, save for the fact that he was pointing something at her. The ranged weapon of this world: a "gun". Of course, she thought dourly.

"Can't let you take your sword now," he grunted. He had aimed for her torso, but it was better that he had shot her thigh instead. Since she wouldn’t die that easily from such a wound, exacting his full revenge would be all the more easier.

"Knowing that you could not hope to compete in melee combat, you decided to use that," she said through gritted teeth.

"Does it matter? All RHG is about is beating your opponent anyway," He shouted, annoyed that she had called him out, "bet you did worse to Sebastian. Yeah, that's it. He couldn't have lost otherwise. Not to you..."

His words gradually turned to incoherrent murmurs that became impossible to hear through the rain, but Kalena cared little for his monologue. All that was in her mind was the sword that lay before her, it's hilt just out of reach...

"Kuh...!" She gasped as another shot was fired, this time into her back. she felt her body burning, even as she was in the freezing wet ground. Her mind screamed at her to give up, to accept the fate that would befall her. Yet in the last bit of conciousness she vehemently refused to fall, urged by her pride as a swordswoman. It was at this moment that Corvon would have come sprinting over, she thought, using whatever means he had to rescue her. He would've been shouting, telling them to stop. Even as her hand clawed at the dirt for her sword, the thought did not leave her, passing through her mind over like a broken record.

Corvon would be there to save me. He would always do so.

He would be there to save me.

A frown found its way on her lips. That was wrong. Why was she was she having such wishful thoughts? There would be nothing but her own strength to rely on. Her strength, her power, and her blade. That was all she had, and all she would use, for she had decided the very moment she had stepped foot in this world. She would win this battle through her own capabilities...!

“Not enough,” Bodacious scowled, his grip on his gun tightening as he spoke, “not enough. You haven’t gotten enough. I’ll make you feel Sebastian’s pain twofold!”

He had forgotten himself then, blindly shooting at his prone opponent with all he had. All that was in his mind was to avenge the death of his friend. That was the entire point of this death match; to punish the one that had wronged Sebastian. Sparks flew as many of the bullets went wild from the recoil, but he cared not for his accuracy; one of them had to hit. He stopped when he heard the gun click, then cursed as he fumbled around for a new cartridge to reload it with.

It was at that time where the tiny scraping of dirt sounded, inaudible to the both of them. Nonetheless it was the most important sound. The scraping that sounded the end of the battle.

There was no time for Bodacious to react, if he knew what was happening at all. for it came without warning; the roar of the earth as a rock spike burst through the ground, piercing through his stomach with its jagged tip. He gasped, overwhelmed by the agony. So great it was, that his grip on his only weapon loosened. And with the splash that came as his revolver fell, the revelation that he had lost this battle. What did she do? How? Those questions revolved in his barely conscious mind, but there was no answer to them.

And in the brink of his consciousness, he noticed her figure, hobbling toward him with her sword as a support. For a moment, he saw her face, illuminated by the lightning that flashed so briefly. Her face was a mess, covered in mud and water, a far cry from her original appearance. But what hadn’t changed was the determination in her eyes. Determination to win even in the direst of circumstances.

“I had hoped it to be a fairer battle,” she murmured, “though I suppose, given the system, that was pretty much impossible.”

She began chanting, and gradually, a ball of light formed in her left hand. At first faint, but grew stronger in brilliance, and began to form a familiar shape. The shape of a sword.

“Nonetheless, I shall end it with this blade. For our honor, it should be finished with a weapon, not through cowardly tactics.”

Bodacious watched her raise the execution blade, but could do nothing to stop her. Dimly he wondered the point of honor at all; he was going to die, what difference did it make in the way he died?

“Kalena, stop!”

The swordswoman tilted her head in the direction of the voice. A figure stood, a little ways from them, but even without being able to see her face she could tell who it was. Even then her expression remained emotionless, as though she had been expecting his arrival all along.

“Corvon,” she said plainly, “do not interfere. It is our fight, not yours.”

“I’ll interfere if I want!” He shouted, though it was clear that his voice was trembling, “you’ve defeated him; there is no point in killing!”

“This man said to have a death match,” she glanced towards Bodacious’ limp body, “I believe none of us have heard wrong.”

“Does it matter? No one should die from this!” Corvon countered, “dispel the transient blade!”

“...And if I do not?” She replied. Saying this, she prepared to swing the transient blade, to end the final spark of life that her opponent possessed. Corvon knew from those words she was serious. She was going to kill Bodacious, his objections be damned.

{}”If you want something done, you go out and do it. Life doesn’t give handouts; hoping gets you nothing.”

Of course, he thought, now truly realising what Jeff had meant. Till now all he did was to fret and worry, yet only stood and watched when she killed. What did he expect to happen? For her to simply stop without reason? If he truly wanted her to cease killing, he would have to show it in his actions, as Jeff had implied in his words.

“Border Seal!”

Glyphs shone by his feet, bursting with a blueish flame that illuminated the surroundings. Two squares, shining in bright orange etched themselves into the ground, one encircling Bodacious, and the other, Kalena. She swung regardless, but as the tip of the blade reached to the border of her square, it disappeared long before it reached Bodacious, as though it were swallowed by the border itself.

“Kalena, you won’t gain anything to kill him, so please stop!” He shouted, his tone more pleading than ever.

She stared at him for a moment, her expression as cryptic as before. He returned the gaze fully, his heart thumping in anticipation. After what seemed like an eternity, her conjured blade dissipated from her hand, and she sheathed her own sword, though she still used it for support. At the same time, the spike that had pierced Bodacious withdrew back to the earth, leaving his limp body on the ground.

Seeing her concede, he dispelled the barriers and headed straight for Bodacious; the one he considered the most in danger. He quickly etched a few glyphs on the ground and uttered, “heal.”

The glyphs glowed at his words, sending forth blue sparks that travelled over to Bodacious, targeting the gaping wound at his stomach. Skin twisted and turned, stretching over the wound along with the muscle. Soon the wound was closed, leaving only a scar as a reminder of it. Bodacious watched it all with dimmed eyes, but even as Corvon was done he said nothing, turning his attention back onto the ground.

Without a moment’s hesitation, Corvon did the same for Kalena, closing her bullet wounds with the same ease as before. She left without another word after that, leaving Corvon to follow her. He gave one final glance at Bodacious before he did so. What was the man thinking? Regret? Dishonor? He felt sorry for him, but there was nothing he could do about it. What was done was done. He tore his eyes off the man and chased after Kalena, who paid no notice even as he caught up.

Silence ensued between the two, even as they approached Jeff’s car. Corvon glanced at her frequently, wondering how she felt about him. Angry? Betrayed? He wouldn’t be surprised if she weren’t speaking to him for those reasons, but regardless he had to do what he did. He had no regrets, though a tinge of doubt still lingered in his mind.

Jeff walked over to greet them, his arms spread wide, “ah, friends. I was beginning to think you abandoned me!”

Kalena only gave him a curt nod, “My apologies for the wait. Shall we go?”

Her words were as polite as ever, but it didn’t take Jeff more than a second to realise they were noticeably strained. That, and the fact that her appearance had completely changed. Her now dishevelled hair was matted with dirt and mud, as were her clothes. He made no mention or reaction to this, however, if only for the sake of courtesy.

“Ah,” he grinned, “Lover’s quarrel. Of course, we’ll leave. Take a seat at the back, won’t you?”

He watched her enter the car, then whispered to Corvon, “to the front seat you go. Bad things will happen to you if you don’t.”

Corvon couldn’t agree more. He slipped into the front seat, right as Jeff entered his own driver’s seat. The car was started shortly after, and they left the gas station in a melancholic mood.

“Corvon, was it?” Jeff murmured.

“Hm?” The mage turned at the call.

“You did a good thing. Cheer up.”

Corvon forced a smile, but it was obvious that he didn’t feel at all cheery.

Did a good thing...perhaps, but the right thing? He could not tell if it truly was.

cowboy bodacious
12-21-2012, 07:08 PM
Wow Lobotomizer, you did an amazing job job on bodcious. superbly well done. would like to see your thoughts on my version.

SpeerMintty
12-22-2012, 07:23 PM
Wow, both stories were great:
CB: Great work on keeping your character in play, along with the dialogue. But try to Format it as Lobotomizer had, and check for some spelling mistakes

Lobo: Great description for both characters, and major kudos to add Corvon!!! Couldnt really find anything i thought felt wrong...

Lobotomizer
12-30-2012, 10:40 AM
It's been awhile; I haven't really gotten much time until now. It might be quiet late, but nonetheless I believe I should at least put out my thoughts for your fight.

As SpeerMintty said, you need to format your writing. Sticking multiple dialogues in the same paragraph makes it hard to read and is somewhat off putting. try to have one paragraph for each dialogue from one character. Sometimes it'll end up with you having just one line of dialogue in a paragraph, but at the very least, it's clear to read.

I believe this goes without saying, but you lack terribly in grammar, spelling and punctuation. Did you bother proof reading your own work? As jarring it is to see them, some grammar mistakes are unavoidable. However, rampant spelling and punctuation errors simply show a lack of negligence on your part, so make sure you proofread at least once. Not doing so just shows that you are lazy. Lazy is not good.


"Yea your right," my voice picked back up to its perky, upbeat tone, " If she attacks first then it would be self deffence like Sebastian!"

This. Is stupid logic. It's hard to say anything otherwise. Self defense or not, you would still be hitting a woman. It is a flimsy excuse, and I'd accept it if your character was skeptical about such an excuse, but he seemed utterly convinced that using "self defense" is a totally legitimate reason to absolve himself of all sin. It's utterly wrong.


Sebastain came with me, he wanted to watch the fight since I kept him from killing her last time. I think he wanted to appologize as well. I knew I might need backup as well, incase she saw the evil in me and tried to kill me so it was a relief fo have him as help.

More stupid logic. But first, I'd like to point you toward your complete and utter lack of description. How did he know sebastian wanted to apologise? What does his being stopped from killing Kalena have to do with wanting to watch the fight?

Take note, "it was a relief to have him as help" (I'm not even sure if that sentence is right grammatically), you stated he was just watching. He wouldn't be "help" unless something happens, such as Bodacious being at the edge of death. A precautionary measure is what it is, not help.

Finally, we get to the stupid logic part. "in case she saw the evil in me and tried to kill me"

Other than this sentence being more awkward than celebrating a birthday without a cake, it is also devoid of common sense. See the evil in him? Does your character even consider himself a sinner? He doesn't sound the type to be terribly paranoid that he would suspect her to instantly brand him as a sinner and outright kill him, why would he think that way? On top of that, does it even matter? The gladiatorial system allows for killing, what different would Kalena be from other opponents who kill their foes?


Along with him I was riding my mare pearl and Sebastain on a 7 year old mustange I befriended in the when first arrived to Stick Page City

This sentence makes no sense.


Corvon looked nervously around, he was visibly scared by the fact I brought Sebastain with me

Again, you have little to no explanation as to why he would be scared.


"Let us skip the plesentries," Kalena's face grew emotionless

Plesentries. Please proofread your work.


"but first tell me why have you joined this system that pits others to fights to most often death? What are you in it for, money, fame, power, blood lust?" I lowered my head with a slight sigh, I thought deeply for a moment.

Abrupt, and awkward dialogue.


That question had been answered several times of me already and I gave the same responce everytime.

Spelling and grammar.


But, recently I have a new reason, you see I made a promise to Sebatian here," I nodded at him, "to keep his inner demon in check.

Being in the RHG does not help that a single bit.


She frowned scorfully at me, "I have read your profile, it says you will be headed to your nation's army; how shall you keep your promise to your friend to keep him in check?" She raised an eyebrown to indicate she had her douts

The spelling. Why.


I looked back at Sebastain, he smiled. He was eternally grateful for what I have done for him.

Once more, description. This isn't the Bodacious show. Have Sebastian say something, rather than to just stand mutely. A smile doesn't show eternal gratefulness. How does Bodacious know? He was told? He felt that way? Why?


Kalena was bewildered, "How, how can this be? What scorcery is this? No hat should be able to withstand even a normal sword no less the sword of truth!"

Every moment you spend yapping your mouth off is time the opponent has to lop your head off. And Kalena's seen more than a few battles, as I'm sure you should know.

Actually, your battle lacks logic for the most part. Why would Kalena be frustrated that her opponent has a shield? A battle of attrition is still a battle, there's no reason for her, or indeed anyone, to feel that way, unless they are losing that battle, or they are impatient in personality.


"Now while he is stuck there me and you have unfinished business, you must leave the system or I will cut you down."


This is barbarian language. In fact, half the time the dialogue you wrote sounds like something that would come from a child. Read them to yourself and ask yourself if it sounds good at all, because it certainly doesn't to me. Also, she didn't bother to wait for a response before trying to cut down Sebastian? Do you even have her original goal in mind?


It was me; I was horrified that she had went after my friend after having subdued me. I let the evil inside out. A surge of power tore through my body as I gave everything I had to break open the earthen cacoon I was entrapped in. I erupted up sended rocks hurteling everywhere.

What a lukewarm reaction. You failed to pull off the "rage" part because you had little to no description on your character's feelings. The reader can't sympathize; everyone seems to have the emotion of a brick wall.


I looked at her with a burning hatred and said in a low deep vioce, "I told you I am loyal to my friends, so you think I would just sit idly by and watch you murder him infront of me?" Kalena was in shock, "So you are not the nice person you claim to be, you are a demon is disguise! I shall cleanse this earth of your essence!"

At this point I would have been chuckling, because what Kalena had been doing is wanton violence, seemingly using every bit of excuse to kill someone, and this sounded no different. It's downright sad and hilarious. This is also what I meant by a lack of logic.

Lastly, you make very sweeping statements about the battle itself. Swing left, swing right, dodge this, dodge that. No observation, nothing.

There's no need to quote the rest of the story, since I have gotten most of the glaring parts in your writing.

Do read, and for the love of god, proofread your own writing.