StickPage Spring Animation Competition - For Glory: eSports - $5,000 in prizes, 15 placements, $1,500 first prize!
BEGINNER'S StickPage Spring Animation Competition - Unconventional Weapons - $1,000 in prizes!
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 20

Thread: Bulwark-The unbreakable

  1. #1

    Bulwark-The unbreakable

    Name:Bulwark


    Spoiler for <Powers>:





    Spoiler for <Weakness>:







    Spoiler for <Personality>:







    Spoiler for <Appearance>:







    Spoiler for <Backstory>:







    Spoiler for <Demo>:


    Spoiler for win/loss:


    Spoiler for In progress:



    Not the best writer but i figured this would be a good chance to become better at it.
    Last edited by jirocho1; 09-27-2017 at 05:53 AM. Reason: Updated powers

  2. #2
    Socially Awkward Guy
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Location
    NOPE
    Posts
    18
    I think it's fairly decent. But, Im new here, so I know nothing.

    Dont take what I say too seriously.

    But it seems decent (I think)

  3. #3
    Seņor MemeBar Alphaeus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    Ah...no.
    Posts
    1,147
    Hey, this is pretty good.

    I like the concept of a character built entirely around defensive maneuvers (although I'm going to presume he can use his shields aggressively too).

    All in all I don't have much CnC to give. Just paying attention to your grammar, particularly sentence structure. Sometimes it helps to read your work aloud and think about how it sounds versus other books (I use Clive Cussler as my reference books usually. Can't best the master.).

    I haven't read your demo (don't usually until I need to know more about the char) but from the background it seems you've got a good grasp on a good char.

    Nice job, and welcome to the Writer's Lounge, dude!
    My wRHG Char: The Fixer
    "oh fuck yeah, taco, you've been naughty" ~ Vorpal
    "" ~ Index


    ~Arch

    ~^^ENTER THE TUNNEL^^~

  4. #4
    Blending City ErrorBlender's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Philippines
    Posts
    4,316
    Oh hey! Its the dude from Hero RP! If you remember Cecile, my current wRHG is similar to her in terms of ability. Bulwark's abilities are fairly alright so I have nothing to say against them.

    Welcome to the lounge, fellow RP dude.



    Spoiler for :

  5. #5
    Gold Member RichardLongflop's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Location
    Britain.
    Posts
    1,266
    I already love this guy. Your personality there may be seen as cliche and overdone, but in reality it's perfect for defensive chars like this. Your offense is non-lethal, only being protective. And because of that, it's very fitting that he is a protector.

    I hope you stick around! Would like to see stuff from this guy in future.


  6. #6
    Thank you guys, im glad you enjoyed Bulwark. Ive been planning out his powers for awhile and what not. In his orginal state his powers were just the buckler and tower shield.

  7. #7
    Senior Member Urako's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Posts
    635
    I would like to agree with the others that Bulwark is a pretty cool character and a pretty fitting name for him as well. But if it's alright with you, could you tell me what made him decide to join RHg or if he's (in universe) officially joined at all?

    Quote Originally Posted by RichardLongflop View Post
    Your personality there may be seen as cliche and overdone, but in reality it's perfect for defensive chars like this. Your offense is non-lethal, only being protective. And because of that, it's very fitting that he is a protector.

    I hope you stick around! Would like to see stuff from this guy in future.
    I found that there are two basic "shield" archetypes and they're on both ends of the spectrum. Those who selflessly want to protect others, and those who are selfish and do everything for self-preservation. It appears this character is the first of those and a pretty good character at that.
    Last edited by Urako; 12-13-2016 at 07:55 PM.
    I believe in Jesus Christ as my Savior. If you're not afraid to admit it then paste this into your signature.

    I am a self-proclaimed wRHG fight instigator.

    Here is my wRHG character Dozer!

  8. #8
    Hes always looking for a challenge and a way to test his skills.

  9. #9
    Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    In a blue box somewhere in Asia.
    Posts
    75
    As the others have said, this char is actually really good! The fact that he was born in a monastery and was raised by monks made me like your character a lot more. So with that said and done, I'd like to say goodluck with your char and have fun!

  10. #10
    This is a pretty solid character - pun not really intended.
    I agree with Alphaeus in that checking of sentence structure is required. However, I'd like to point out also that in your demo, you type 'I' as 'i' sometimes, and misuse some punctuation marks. It is to my understanding that you would like to take this chance to get better at writing, and I hope that you will succeed at this.

    The main concern I have is with your strength of "immense pool of energy and stamina". Perhaps you'd like to clarify a little more on this point, as it could very well potentially nullify your only listed weakness of "taking blows head on", as it could be explained off as he took damage but still has enough energy to continue the battle with minimal damage due to his sheer immense pool of energy and stamina.

    That being said, I look forward to seeing you around in battles. Perhaps I'll get a chance to read your works?

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •