“Do you think this would be good, Eli?”

Matthew Nielson, a short, 3-foot tall blue alien, waved his hand at a rack of colorful-looking yo-yos. Despite the wintry conditions, the inventor was wearing his standard attire: an ocean-blue shirt with an M logo on the front, dark grey cargo pants, and a pair of yellow-and-black shoes with silver lightning bolts on the sides.

His friend, Eli…a hulking monster of a man…stood nearby; amber eyes glittering from within the shadows of his ragged fur hood. His clothing was on the dull-and-drab side of things; a worn grey shirt, a black cargo pants, and a large light grey overcoat that reached all the way down to his ankles. Finishing off the look was a pair of sneakers; both of which looked like they’d walked all around the world and then some. The man shrugged, and then grunted something unintelligible. The inventor rubbed at the back of his head, and then looked back at the toys.

“Well…I would have wanted the silver one.”

Grunt.

“Oh yeah! I’m supposed to get something for my Secret Santa!”

Another grunt.

“I agree. Clothes section it is.”

Matthew wasn’t usually the one to go shopping for anything. Usually, he could just find odds and ends in the junkyard, and then build something for his purposes. But not today. Today…was special. Christmas was coming up, and some good friends of his in Vague City suggested he participate in an event they held every year: wRHG Secret Santa.

Matthew wasn’t an official wRHG, but the lady at the signup desk was so nice, that she entered him into it…without him having to enlist in any gladiator competitions. Not that Matthew didn’t want to participate; he’d been part of a big one already, but it sort of died…leaving him free to explore the universe once more.

The inventor’s glowing yellow eyes flickered across the racks, and he pulled a crumpled bit of paper out of his pocket.

“So…this is the size I need…” he muttered, walking through the aisle.

He stopped at a dress display, and inspected the clothes with a critical eye. His friend stood silent, its gaze on one dress in particular. Eventually, Matthew noticed what he was up to, and his face brightened.

“You like that one?” he asked, pointing to a gi with swirly star designs on it. Someone must have taken it here from another part of the store, and then hung it with the rest of the dresses.

“Nnnngh.” Eli confirmed.

“Starry gi it is!” was Matthew’s reply. He walked over to the gi, and then realized how high it was up on the hangar. Hesitant, he looked left and right. The last thing he wanted was someone walking over here and seeing him on a chair.

As he stood undecided, Eli walked up to him, reached out, and took the gi easily off the rack. Matthew breathed a quick sigh of relief, and patted his friend’s leg.

“Thanks, Eli! You’re the best.”

The man nodded, handing Matthew the gi and grunting to himself. The friends then walked to the cashier, stopping just long enough for Matthew to get himself a silver yo-yo.



Back at the hotel, Matthew and Eli stood in the bedroom, their gift laid out on the bed in front of them. Matthew folded his arms and cocked his head to the side, looking over at Eli.

“I don’t know…” he began. “…it looks a little too ordinary to me. What do you think?”

Eli continued to stare at the gi for a while, and then slowly faced Matthew.

“Nnnngh…” he said.

The inventor shrugged returned his gaze to the gi. He stroked the starry fabric, deep in thought.

“It needs something special…something…useful…” he murmured.

Suddenly, Matthew’s head snapped up, and he looked over at Eli.

“Hey! I forgot to watch Justice today!”

He darted out of the room, taking a flying leap and landing on the couch. With Eli’s help, he’d moved the seat so that it faced the kitchen area, where there was a small TV dangling down from the ceiling. There was a TV in the bedroom too, but it wasn’t worth using. When operational, it had an opaque hockey game burned permanently into the screen.

Matthew pulled the remote out from between the couch cushions, and clicked the TV on. The screen flickered to life, and the inventor giggled a bit as he recognized the channel. CNN.

“Uh…” Matthew began, cocking his head to the side. “Why is the funny show on?”

Eli came up behind the couch, draping the gi over the top of it. Matthew glanced at it a moment, sighed, and then turned his attention back to the TV.

“Nnnngh.” Eli said.

The inventor nodded and raised the remote.

“Me too. I’ll switch to Fox News.”

As he was about to hit the button, however, he paused a moment, narrowing his eyes at the screen. There was a riot report on. Matthew watched as the armored cops pushed the crowds back, and his eyes widened. He leaped to his feet, switching the channel to Fox before turning the TV off.

“That’s it!” he cried, whirling to face Eli. The man stared at him, tilting his head to the side.

“I’ll put Kevlar into this gi! It should be pretty easy for me; I’ve made more complex things anyways.”

He took the gift, folding it up carefully. Eli watched a bit.

“Nnnngh.” he said.

Matthew carried the gi back into the bedroom, placing it on a large table. Scattered across it were leftovers from previous projects; varied types of metal, old computer equipment (mainly circuit boards), and a host of other miscellaneous tech-type items. Bending down, Matthew pulled a cardboard box out of underneath the table. It was full of different types of fabric, but most of them were in small pieces. Matthew sighed, riffling through the bits for a while, and then turned to Eli.

“Nnnngh?” Eli asked.

“Yeah…” the inventor replied. “I use most of this stuff for little logos and things on my work…I don’t usually do costumes.”

He stood there a moment, rubbing at the back of his crest.

“This will be my first time as a clothing designer…”

The inventor’s hand slid to under his chin area, and then, suddenly, he perked up.

“I know exactly who to call!”



A couple of hours later, there was a knock on the door of Matthew and Eli’s hotel room. Eli opened the door, and in walked a powerful-looking, suntanned, well-muscled 40-year-old. His buzz cut looked the same as ever, his dog tags were bright and shiny, and his dark grey eyes still retained their intensity. Although he wasn’t wearing his black bandana…Matthew could definitely pick this guy out in a crowd. In terms of uniform, the man wore his “traditional” dark green cargo pants, weathered black military boots, and a sleek winter jacket with a commando ranking mark on its left shoulder.

At the sight of Matthew, the man grinned broadly, pressing his fists to his hips with a chuckle.

“Long time no see, recruit!” he greeted, his voice as strong and commanding as his appearance. “I heard you needed some material!”

Matthew rushed over, and the man got down on one knee so Matthew could hug his neck more easily.

“Sarge!” Matthew cried, maintaining the embrace a moment before stepping back. “It’s so good to see you again!”

The man let out a booming laugh before replying.

“And you as well, recruit! It’s been too long since I’ve had you at my humble camp.”

He then turned to Eli, putting a hand to his chin.

“And who’s this?” he asked. “Does he shake hands?”

Eli stuck his hand out, and the men shook while Matthew giggled to himself.

“His name is Eli.” the inventor replied. “I found him out in the street, so I made him my friend.”

“I see.”

“He doesn’t talk much.”

Eli nodded slowly. “Nnnngh.”

Sarge mirrored the action, his broad grin showing off his perfect teeth.

“A pleasure to meet you, soldier.” he answered.

Matthew folded his arms, trying to keep his face as serious as possible.

“Do you have the Kevlar?” he asked Sarge.

Sarge laughed and unzipped his jacket, revealing its fur-lined interior, and then hung it up on a hook by the hotel room door. He was wearing a very expensive-looking bulletproof vest. With a swift, graceful motion, he removed the vest and handed it to Matthew. As the inventor had suspected, Sarge was wearing his camo-patterned shirt underneath it, complete with all the medals around its lower hem.

Matthew took the vest, beaming at his old friend.

“Thanks!” he said. “I hope this wasn’t too much trouble or anything.”

“Oh no, of course not.” was the reply. “I’ve got friends in the force.”

The inventor inspected the vest, running his hands over its surface.

“This is perfect!” he said after awhile.

“Glad you’re happy.”

Matthew looked up at Sarge, and then his eyes widened.

“Okay…uh, I feel like I should thank you somehow…”

Sarge chuckled. “No need for that, recruit. I’m just helping you out. Besides, I can’t stay long. I’ve got new rookies in camp now; they need training.”
Matthew’s shoulders slumped for a moment, and then he brightened and ran to the kitchen. Eli followed; remarkably swift on his feet. He opened the fridge for Matthew, and the inventor reached inside and grabbed an orange juice carton. Turning to Sarge, he waved the carton in the air.

“Before you leave, can you please drink a glass of orange juice first?”

Sarge smiled, and Matthew motioned to Eli, who got a glass out of a kitchen cupboard.

“You can’t say no because I’m already holding the carton.” the inventor continued.

The commando laughed and walked up to the pair.

“Well, I guess a drink would do me good. Thanks recruit.”

“Don’t mention it.”



“Eli! Eli, I think we’re late!”

The man bolted upright, springing to his feet.

“Nnnngh?” he asked.

Matthew had the folded gi in his hands, and was looking at his watch. He kept rapidly shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

“And we forgot something important.” he continued. “We need to wrap this present, but first…let’s have breakfast.”

The morning went by in a blur. Matthew had his normal duties: brushing Eli’s teeth, and carefully feeding him his mushed-bread-and-milk-plus-applesauce breakfast. Since the two hadn’t thought of buying wrapping paper, Matthew took the pillowcase from the hotel bed and carefully wrapped the gift in that. He then took a pretty ribbon off an empty box of chocolates, and took it to his work table.

“The case doesn’t look too nice…” Matthew said. “…but I can at least make an attractive ribbon.”

“Nnnngh.” Eli remarked, making a book-opening motion with his hands.

Matthew stared for a moment, and then slapped his forehead.

“Oh yeah! We need a card to go with this!”

The inventor stood there, his gaze sweeping from the gi along his work table.

“Hmmm…oh! I know what to do!”

Matthew opened up the drawers of a bedside table, pulling out a small blueprint. He folded it in half, and then took a permanent marker out of his pocket. Opening the blueprint, he tapped the marker end on his chin.

“Um…I’m not really good with words…” he said slowly, looking over at Eli. The man came over and stood beside him.

“Nnnngh.”

The inventor shrugged, and then looked back at the card.

“How about we write some sort of cool message on it? Like… ‘Merry Christmas, Bethany Brookes!’.”

“Nnnngh.”

“Too plain, huh? Well…does ‘I hope you have a merry time’ sound better?”

Eli shook his head, and Matthew looked back at the card.

“Yeah…that doesn’t sound too good. ‘Have a Happy Ho-ho-holiday just sounds cheesy, and I don’t want to make it too personal either. I don’t know my Santa that well.”

The two then stared silently at the card, and suddenly Eli moved over to the bedside table, and then drew on the dust with his finger. He stopped, and Matthew walked over, standing on his tiptoes to see better.

“G, I?” he queried. “Yeah…that’s how you spell gi. But how does that help?”

Eli added two more letters at the end, and then looked at Matthew.

“Nnnngh.” he said.

Matthew’s eyes widened. “Hey…that spells gift! I know exactly what to do now!”

He spun to Eli and hugged his leg.

“Thanks Eli! You’re the best!”

The inventor then turned to the blueprint, scribbled down the message, and slid the card into the pillowcase. Then, he took the chocolate box ribbon and a circuit board from a RC remote, blending them together seamlessly while Eli watched, entranced by the inventor’s motions.



The gift is a navy-blue gi, with silver star patterns swirling across its surface. The belt is silver, and the edges of the sleeves are trimmed with a delicate white lace. It is folded neatly inside a pillowcase, which is also folded, and topped with a red bow that sports a rather intricate circuit-board-type pattern spiderwebbing across it.

In addition to the gi, there is a folded blueprint card in the case; it has a “Merry Christmas” greeting on the front, and inside, its says “Gi is for gift!” in wavy letters.

Due to the Kevlar, this gi is highly resilient and somehow lighter than it was originally. Matthew’s mastery of the inventive arts is unmatched; the fabric of the gi has retained its silkiness and flexibility. It’s like you’re wearing air!