I am going to play and win in 1 turn.

I am the only person on my team.

I call an artillery strike on your position. The arty is firing nuclear rounds made of cancer and plague. I also carpet bomb the area. With napalm. Also the napalm is also made of cancer. I then use a giant tractor beam to pull a 5kmx5kmx5km meteor made of kryponite on top of you. The resulting shock wave kills three million people and un-sinks Atlantis. To finish it off, I kill your dog and drink a martini while on a cruise in the Caribbean. Also the martini has a twist of lemon in it. I then go back in time and make a business deal with Hitler to prevent you from ever being born.

Do I win yet?

no. I createed an alternate reality to steal the portal machine and teleport myself into carmen electra's pants while the armageddon blows over. after i emerge, i create a portal inside your ass and then create one under a falling piece of wreckage. as you lie wincing on the ground and trashing in pain i go back in time and pimp-slap hitler to death. then i buy another dog and walk into the sunset.

so no, you dont win.

Quote from Beefy

no. I createed an alternate reality to steal the portal machine and teleport myself into carmen electra's pants while the armageddon blows over. after i emerge, i create a portal inside your ass and then create one under a falling piece of wreckage. as you lie wincing on the ground and trashing in pain i go back in time and pimp-slap hitler to death. then i buy another dog and walk into the sunset.

so no, you dont win.

What is this? I don't even

Quote from Beefy

no. I createed an alternate reality to steal the portal machine and teleport myself into carmen electra's pants while the armageddon blows over. after i emerge, i create a portal inside your ass and then create one under a falling piece of wreckage. as you lie wincing on the ground and trashing in pain i go back in time and pimp-slap hitler to death. then i buy another dog and walk into the sunset.

so no, you dont win.

only flat walls that aren't dark gray are portal-able, so your plan is flawed.

Quote from Flood

What is this? I don't even

this is the GREAT BATTLE FORUM. so suck it flood.

Quote from Myself

only flat walls that aren't dark gray are portal-able, so your plan is flawed.

slightly untrue. in the last level, you can make portals on walls that are black too. and who says that i cant hire someone to carry a white tile around to make portals on?

Quote from Beefy

slightly untrue. in the last level, you can make portals on walls that are black too. and who says that i cant hire someone to carry a white tile around to make portals on?

there isnt a tile in my ass though

Quote from Myself

there isnt a tile in my ass though

not for long...

Yeah, there is a giant co-

I explode all the universes.

I win.

Yeah but you killed yourself too. And I died last so technically I win.

no. I hid in the tall grass and used my stealth +3 gauntlets to escape the inferno that kills countless millions.

Quote from Flood

Yeah but you killed yourself too. And I died last so technically I win.

what? no, im in the Caribbean

Quote from Beefy

no. I hid in the tall grass and used my stealth +3 gauntlets to escape the inferno that kills countless millions.

pft.

pft ?

your grass asplode, killing you instantly