Our story begins after an invisible, omnipotent, omniscient being (we’ll call him Fred) had created basically everything in a couple of days. Shortly after this Fred decided to make some guy out of a pile of dust. Fred was satisfied with his creation but he knew that something was missing. So being the pro that he was, our magician Fred exhaled up the dust-man's nose and turned him into a perfectly normal human being with a ghost inside of him to give him consciousness and personality. Fred called him Gary.
Then, Fred made some plants and animals out of the ground and told Gary to take care and name all of them. The garden Fred made was perfect and consisted of every plant and animal coexisting in harmony with the land. Just for fun Fred told Gary not to eat fruit from this one tree, if he did Gary would die. This was pointless though because even if Gary did die, his ghost of consciousness would live on forever anyway. After naming all the animals for no reason Gary got sad because none of them could help him tend to the perfectly self-reliant garden where he had been placed. Fred saw Gary’s sadness and KO’d him and then stole one of his dusty ribs. Then, Fred made a chick out of the rib. The rib-woman was beautiful and after Gary awoke from his unconscious stupor he named her Gina. The dust-man and the rib-woman ran around their garden naked and everything was wonderful.
Time passed and eventually an evil, talking, upright-walking snake went up to Gina and said, "Sup, u shuld go ete det frewt!" Gina was all like, "No wai bro, Fred sais well die if we do." The snake said, "Na, u wont di. Ull just no the difrnce between gud nd bad nd ull turn into a pro like Fred." Gina was intrigued by this and said, “Sweet deel man” and Gina and Gary ate the fruit.
That’s when things got weird.
Gary and Gina started freaking out because they were naked so they made some clothes out of leaves and hid in some trees whenever Fred came around. Shortly after that Fred went into the garden and said, “Where you at?” This was rhetorical because Fred was omnipotent, omniscient, and of course magic. Knowing the jig was up Gary stated, "I herd u comin and I got scurd cuz I was nakid so me nd Gina hid." So Fred said, "wtf, I told u guise not 2 eet det frwt??? I’m veri angry… >:C" Gary blamed his wrong-doings on Gina who then cried, "Da snake guy triked me omg ugh plz dunt hurt mi." By now Fred was super angry so he went super-saiyan and started owning everyone with his skills. He made the snake lose his ability to walk and made him eat dirt.
I lost the rest.