The Absence of Warmth

Started by: Nikx232 | Replies: 6 | Views: 515

Nikx232
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Oct 2, 2013 8:04 PM #1090967
This piece of writing was purely written out of inspiration (and my own amusement) in response to BoomerangReturns' The Unknown Pain.
Feel free to read and critique as you like.
Hope you enjoy~

The Note (Click to Show)
Damian
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Oct 3, 2013 6:21 AM #1091100
I like how at the end the absence of warmth can both refer to the cold and the how the girl feels in the situation(absence of warmth in a person's heart). Another thing, you typed 'would filled' but, that would be 'would fill', mmk? Good luck on future writing, mate!
Nikx232
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Oct 3, 2013 6:40 AM #1091101
gahhhh I missed that xD
Oh well, I should check more thoroughly next time. :U
Thanks for the complement and I'm glad you enjoyed it~!
Boomerang
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Oct 3, 2013 9:36 AM #1091133
I really liked this. Short, but still very emotional in the eyes of the girl
ErrorBlender
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Oct 3, 2013 4:16 PM #1091222
The mere coincidence that I had this song playing while I was reading this made the short so much more than it is. Not to say that the piece isn't good alone. It is. The song amplified it. :)

WoodKid - I Love You

Anyway, I liked the piece. Good work, dude. I'd like to see a bit more on this. If there will be.
Nikx232
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Oct 3, 2013 7:06 PM #1091257
Thanks, but probably not going to expand anymore on this one. I made this piece on the fly almost like a response in a story like setting under 5 minutes (?) It took a pretty short time to write it.

The true credit should go to Boom who wrote his piece and inspired me as I read his piece on one of my breaks. I read stuff that comes in or is suggested to me and this one just happened to catch my attention.
Damian
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Oct 3, 2013 8:31 PM #1091284
Yeah, you should just leave it as it is and not expand. It works that way.