There once was a cheesy tiger
Who always transformed into a liger
One day he took a blow to the head
Slipped in the rain and ended up dead
Now he's the deadeesy li-tiger

Post your limericks here

A limerick is a five-line poem with a strict form, originally popularized in English by Edward Lear. Limericks are frequently witty or humorous, and sometimes obscene with humorous intent.

The following example of a limerick is of anonymous origin.

The limerick packs laughs anatomical
Into space that is quite economical,

But the good ones I've seen
So seldom are clean,

And the clean ones so seldom are comical.

Here's one that...you might like.

There once was a man from Peru
Who dreamed he waas eating his shoe

He woke with a fright
In the middle of the night

To find that his dream had come true

the meter on yours is so ****ing wrong, kveyo. it's horrible overall.

spazz's is better, but the meter on "In the middle of the night" is one syllable too many. also it is a better limerick.

There once was a man who was blind
his girlfriend liked it from behind
one night of all
slipped in the wrong hole
the scream of her blew out his mind


The second line is odd, but with a pronounciation like "His GIRLfriend liked IT from beHIND" it's right.

Fuck yeah, I love limericks. I've been having to write them in my Humanities class and I realized I'm good at it.

Chuck Norris

There once was a man named Chuck Norris,
Who was eating a big bowl of porridge,
When some blonde girl barged in,
So he kicked her in the chin,
Then started bangin' some chick named Deloris.


Zambu the Sloth

There once was a sloth named Zambu,
Who wanted to escape from the zoo,
So he concocted a plan,
Which involved a large fan,
But then he forgot what to do.

I can't make a lymric you know,
it turns out that I'm rather slow,
but if it comes out right,
i will sleep tonight,
but to bed is to far to go.

Quote from Überschall

There once was a man who was blind
his girlfriend liked it from behind
one night of all
slipped in the wrong hole
the scream of her blew out his mind


The second line is odd, but with a pronounciation like "His GIRLfriend liked IT from beHIND" it's right.

All and hole doesn't really rhyme. Not even as a slant rhyme.

Miguel walked down the path
He spied many thugs
Tried hard not to laugh
For the thugs not only hugged
They were ****ing like giraffes

Quote from Stuff

Miguel walked down the path
He spied many thugs
Tried hard not to laugh
For the thugs not only hugged
They were ****ing like giraffes

Wrong order...

Miguel had walked down a path,
He tried as hard as he could not to laugh,
For he spied many thugs,
That not only hugged,
But fucked like fucking giraffes.

?

I didn't know they had to rhyme consecutively..my bad lol

Quote from Stuff

I didn't know they had to rhyme consecutively..my bad lol

It's okay, lol. Fix'd though.


GOD. I love limericks.

Here's my personal favortie...

There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He was very proud
As he thought out loud
If my ear was a pussy, I'd **** it.

that was...ok...but kinda offensive.

Quote from Jet

that was...ok...but kinda offensive.

Not so much offensive as... Vulgar.

There was an old man of Madras,
Whose balls were made of fine brass.
So in stormy weather
They both clanged together,
And sparks flew out of his ass!