Okay, for a while now it seems that people have almost forgotten the PS3. gamers are now drawn to systems like Microsoft's xbox360, or Nintendo's "Wii". I am here to tell you some killer reasons why PS3 owns retard-box and the wii'ner :)
1. box 360 is made by Microsoft
Has this not occurred to anyone but me? The same assholes that brought you "vista" - the OS that directly copies Apples OS. They also stole that audio file thing remember if you go way deep in your hard drive. that thing. heres a link -----> :alert: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Criticism_of_Microsoft :alert:
2. Nintendo Needs To Grow Up
As a young supple teenager, I need more mature content in my games. Mario series? Come On Nintendo. How frickin' long are you gonna make such baby games? Welcome to 2008, bitch. It's the year of the FPS. Take some notes from COD3 (for the PS3) and put some blood, boobs, and beer in your products.
3. PS3 superior own technology
Studies clearly show that the PS3's own factor is by a great margarine bigger than x box or Wii. This is achieved by its massive computer storage system technology laser blue ray scanner core cooling gamma quadrant. When you place a blue ray disk into your PS3, visual and audio streaming is initiated. hundreds of tiny elves are notified when the disk is inserted to start reading the disk. While they do this, they sing popular songs on the Sony record label. This is what makes your PS3 "hum". This noise is crucial to the function of the blue ray high definition quality. Pixels are enhanced, much like an energy drink. Colors will appear more vibrant and sharper. No other console has this.
4. "That shit is slick" - Chad Warden
Like my man Chad warden always says, you cant get no pussy with no wii. Can't get no pussy with no x box. It's the slick black that gets the most gamer chicks. PS3 has a built in pussy magnet, free of charge with your purchase. Some gamers have even noticed women flocking to them the moment after you plug in your controller.
5. Sony is currently funding a project to revive Tupac Shakur
A PS3 purchase is money towards the 'Tupac Shakur Revival Fund' which was created in January to fund the research required to revive Tupac. If you don't buy a PS3, obviously you hate Tupac, and if you hate Tupac, you're a queer. I'm sorry folks, it's as simple as that.
6. 5. Celebrities choose the PS3 over other consoles any day
Shaquiel O'neil was seen playing FF7 on ps3. The revelation was so shocking that it shook the very foundation that most gamers had built their lives on. I don't really know what that means or where i'm going with this but the truth is that most celebs are seen with this 600 dollar machine. It owns.
7. the wii
Are you kidding me? The wii? "Hey guys wanna come over and play with my wii?" Don't make me sick. The wii is the queerest name for a console that any chink could ever think up. Goddamn...
8. x box only has the halo series
It's true. There are no other games to look forward to after the halo series. My prediction is that PS3 sales will skyrocket when halo wars is released. It will be so shitty that no one will by it. HAha. Then they would go out of business.
9. Anime only available on blu ray
All japs know that blu ray is the future of High definition video streaming and crystal clear audio, so when you watch your favorite anime, like huka huka hockachow, or Naruto, you will get the full kawaii experience.
10. PS3 flux capacitor
If gaming isn't your thing, just open up your PS3 and dig around for one of the coolest piece of electronics you'll ever come across. The flux capacitor. Normally, this equipment is used for time of day in PS3 games. But when modded to a 1980's delorian, you can have one blast of a ride going back in time!
TL:DR
1. Xbox is made by Microsoft, and they made Vista...which sucks. So if you make one thing that sucks, everything you make sucks.
2. Nintendo is for kids. And should follow the way of everyone else and have boobs, swearing, blood and gore because that's what makes a good game! Nevermind gameplay, we want tits and blood!
3. Technology is superior. BLU-RAY! BLU-RAY! BLU-RAY! THE FUTURE!!!
4. It will get you pussy. Because girls really love you to ramble on about blu-ray and HDR lighting.
5. Sony is trying to revice Tupac...which I guess is cool?
6. Celebrities say it's cool! So it must be!
7. The Wii, just that it sucks...not as to why it does....it just does.
8. The Xbox only has the Halo series. Nevermind the thousands upon THOUSANDS of other games for it.
9. Anime and soon anime is only going to be on blu-ray apparently.
10. It has a flux capacitor that you can put on a delorean and go back in time after you've ripped open a piece of $400 equipment that you bought. So it's cool to buy something expensive and rip it apart to look at the gadgest you don't know shit about.