Because jokes are fun(ny).
I'll try my best not to retell a joke that 5 other people said. Same goes for other people. But other than that, tell the most offensive jokes you can, because we're on the internet, and there are no repercussions.

So a gay guy checks into a hotel, and asks the staff if he can use the shower.
The staff says: "Okay, just don't fap in the shower."
So the guy takes a shower, and after, the hotel service looks into the shower, and sees semen all over the shower.
The staff says: "What the **** we told you not to jerk off in the shower"
And the gay guy says: "I didn't fap, I farted."

A guy goes into a bar and asks for 8 drinks.
The bartender asks: "Hey, why so many drinks?"
The guy says: "To celebrate my first blowjob."
The bartender understands, and then gives the guy his 8 drinks. 10 minutes later, the guy cmoes back and asks for 8 more drinks.
The bartender asks: "Wow, was it that good?"
And the guy says: "No, I just can't get the taste out of my mouth."

3 guys walk into a bar, 1 ducks.

How does Soroku save his new-born daughter from choking?





















He takes his dick out of her mouth.

Was that offensive enough Dark?

What do ye call a fish with no eyes?








A fsh.




.......................HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yes.

Quote from ghostly

What do ye call a fish with no eyes?








A fsh.




.......................HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yes.

It buuuuuuuuuurnsssss *hisses*

A nun is shocked by the foul language used at the local building site, so one day she puts her lunch in a brown paper bag, goes up to them and says "Do you know Jesus Christ?"

The builders are all confused and shake their heads. One of them turns around and shouts "Does anyone over there know Jesus Christ?"

Someone shouts back "Why?"

And the man replies "Because his wife's here with his lunch!"

Why can't Helen Keller read?



Because she's blind.



Why can't Helen Keller drive?









Because shes a woman.

So a guy walks into a bar and sits by a korean man. The korean man kicks the guy and the korean man says, "that was a dojo kick from korea." The guy gets pissed off, then left. He comes back a hour later and hits the korean man, he said to the bartender, "When he wakes up, tell him that was a crowbar from K-mart."

Whats the best part about having sex with a 5 year old? You get to hear the pelvic bone snap.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Wipe your bloody dick on his teddy bear.

How do you stop a toddler from crawling in circles? Nail his other hand to the floor.

Quote from Ashlander

Whats the best part about having sex with a 5 year old? You get to hear the pelvic bone snap.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Wipe your bloody dick on his teddy bear.

How do you stop a toddler from crawling in circles? Nail his other hand to the floor.

O___________O

Quote from ghostly

O___________O

Too much? >.>

Quote from Ashlander

Whats the best part about having sex with a 5 year old? You get to hear the pelvic bone snap.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Wipe your bloody dick on his teddy bear.

How do you stop a toddler from crawling in circles? Nail his other hand to the floor.

How many toddlers does it take to paint a house?
Depends how hard you throw them.

How do you get 100 toddlers into a bucket?
With a blender.

How do you get them out again?
With tortilla chips.

What do you get when you dislocate a toddler's jaw?
Deep Throat.

Quote from Ashlander

Too much? >.>

Just a bit.

Why don't black people have dreams

Cause the last one that did got shot

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree?

One baby nailed to 10 trees.


I'm shit at this.

Dead baby jokes should only be told by people who genuinely relish them.

For example:

Whats the difference between a dead baby and your girlfriend?
You can f**k a dead baby without protection.

Whats the difference between Soroku's newborn daughter and his grandmother?
His grandmother didn't die when he f**ked her.

I'd expect you to be much more at risk of catching something from necrophilia than from your girlfriend.