Blaze The Magical Swordman

Started by: Bresn | Replies: 7 | Views: 1,791

Bresn

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Jun 5, 2013 1:41 AM #996609
Name: Preferred to be called Blaze, real name is David

Abilities: Able to cast magic spells (Water and fire only), example: A fireball, firewall, water shield. Also seems to be able to predict attacks.

Weaknesses: Depending if on what his armed with, his abilities to use magic is weaken or is stronger. A ambush could catch him off guard, and if he used a powerful spell, he would be drained and tired, which is a good moment to attack. He is also not a expert archer.

Weapon combos: Sword/bow: Since he is busy using his sword/bow you won't expect him to cast much spells at you. Unarmed/Knife: Focuses on magic spells A LOT.

About/Story: David grew up, his parents was a mage and a swordman. He learned to use a sword and magic from his parents and from training, he can only cast water and fire spells, but his extra good at fire magic, earning the name Blaze. David is strong willed and will never gives up on something unless he has to. David had a happy and joyful life growing up from a good family, he also took bow training lessons. David grew up to love combat.

Personality: Easy going, honest, kind, does not talk a lot, also gets angered fairly easy(This does affect his combat, when you get him mad his battle skills is stronger yet it's easier to hit him/catch him off guard.

Appearance: Average size, handsome look, short, black hair, wears t-shirt and jeans most of the time.

Demo: "Wow, you are idiots. I repeat, get away from me. What I can do to you is something no one is ever going to believe. There is no one else in this forest." Blaze repeated his warning.

"Give us the money okay? We want to do this the easy way, don't we?" The tall robber replied, all the robbers slightly rise their knife/gun

"Last warning." Blaze said, his face with no expression, it's was impossible to tell what he was feeling.

"Last warning, what a coward! Hahahah!" A robber copied him and laughed, he would regret he ever did that, Blaze slammed into him with amazing speed, tackling him to the ground.

A robber with a knife charged at Blaze, he grabbed his wrist and threw him onto a tree. All of a sudden, a wall of fire burst out of the ground, melting the bullets that was coming toward Blaze.

5 pairs of amazed, surprised, and shocked eyes looked at Blaze, but then water from a nearby lake slammed onto them and send them flying.

Instead of running away while screaming, they came at Blaze again, however, six average robbers is not even close to a challenge for Blaze, he threw them to the side, kick them, and kept punching and throwing the robbers until they decided it was even, some was limping.

Blaze thought the fight was like a little warm up, the next day he decided to pay the robbers a little visit. You would have to be a idiot to not figure out they hide in the forest, how else could had Blaze ran into them?

No one knew what happened when stolen items appeared on the victims' house, banks, museum. It went all over TV and newspaper. Blaze grinned when he saw the news.

Battles: None, for now

Points: 0/0
Hitsuit
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Jun 5, 2013 11:13 AM #997030
I like the idea,a magician(correct me if wrong) nice and cool.
Saf
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Jun 5, 2013 11:39 AM #997061
Lol, I had my doubts when I saw the title, but you have a pretty good wRHG. Just needs a little more development. :P

Also, a few mistakes:

Firstly, proof-read your work. The example below is only one of the mistakes I found while reading your work.
"...Blaze repeated his warning again." To repeat is to say something again, so the word 'again' isn't necessary.

Some of your sentences are too long, when all you're trying to do is get a single point across. For example:
"Instead of running away while screaming, they came at Blaze again, however, six average robbers is not even close to a challenge for Blaze, he threw them to the side, kick them, and kept punching and throwing the robbers until they decided it was even, some was limping."

Finally: "knife/gun"
NEVER DO THIS. NEVER. EVER.

All criticism aside, this is a potentially fantastic wRHG, and I wish you luck for future battles.
Spyrix

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Feb 26, 2015 10:58 PM #1316581
Hey I challenge you to an written rhg battle since this is both our first time we can face off and start our wrhg first battle so how bout it my wrhg is here

http://forums.stickpage.com/showthread.php?91733-electroid pm when ready ill tell you the details
Urako

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Feb 27, 2015 12:07 AM #1316634
Is it just me, or do robbers constantly choose who to mug very poorly in this city?
Matthew Murphy
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Feb 28, 2015 1:25 AM #1317345
Oh my my! How did I missed this wRHG?! I scroll the list everyday and I just noticed this newly awesomely spectacularly wonderfully magnificently written wRHG?! I'll need to check my eyes again. Enough being said, welcome to the wRHG! However, just as Saf said,
Quote from Saf
Some of your sentences are too long, when all you're trying to do is get a single point across.
try to decrease the amount of words to a minimum of 10 and maximum of 16 (it's what I heard).
It might seem frustrating now, but practice makes perfect. Hope to see more of your work in the future. And btw, use spoilers to tidy things up. Just do

[*spoiler=][/spoiler*]

Remove the asteriks (*) The text go in between.

Wish you the best of luck for battles in the future.
Malacal
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Feb 28, 2015 4:57 AM #1317479
Umm, guys... this member is no longer active. I doubt you will get a reply soon.
Spyrix

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Feb 28, 2015 2:56 PM #1317689
Quote from Malacal
Umm, guys... this member is no longer active. I doubt you will get a reply soon.
I noticed