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Stefan

Started by: devi | Replies: 17 | Views: 2,434

devi

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Nov 1, 2013 5:00 AM #1100630
Name: Stefan

Gender: Male

Race: Human

Art:
[spoiler=]Image
Thank you kronozs :3
Image
by Techno936 thank you
Image
Roman made this
Image
Made by Regardinginsanity
Image
By SARX[/spoiler]
Alignment: Vigilante good (He kills and destroys any evil he finds.)

Age: 16

Music:Summertime ashes VIP remix

Family: Nobody knows who they were. Only Stefan knows. You can ask him but there is not a huge chance of him telling you.

Look: [spoiler=]He is quite tall, he is 273 cm long. (That is 9'7". He is by far the tallest wRHG yet.)
He has blonde short curly hair.
He is fit but does not look like it.
(He is not fat though)
He has strange markings all over his body that he has had since birth.
He is Caucasian.
Besides what he is, he still looks human.
He has grey clothes.
A shirt with hoodie, jeans but no shoes.
He only wears his hoodie when in hiding.
His marks are at his neck back and front, both hands, middle of chest, on his back and a huge amount of them in a line on the front of his right arm as seen in the pic.
His eyes turn to flame when he is in wrath mode.
When he is in his stick man mode he is just purpleish grey, red flaming eyes when Wrath mode.
He also has red shades that he got from Ikarhan.
He has a scar on his right cheek, left arm and his chest.[/spoiler]

Personality: [spoiler=]He is normally calm but if provoked will get angry easily.
But he will protect people important to him.
If he gets angry there is a few ways to calm him down.
Like making him remember the good memories with his family before they died.
He is 50-50 smart
A regular person like everyone else with a hair-trigger temper. Usually calm, but when provoked, he'll kick you down and shove your pain up your ass. In other words, don't.
He always tries make jokes, evil and twisted just like his wrath,
[/spoiler]

Abilities: [spoiler=]At first he has no powers, but as the battle progresses. His anger will grow and as his anger grows his strength, speed and durability will grow. He gets to choose when he is in human form what to focus on in a split second like he can change from strength to speed then to durability. Never underestimates his opponents. His blood starts to go faster and boils as he goes into wrath forms. More explanation on this site http://powerlisting.wikia.com/wiki/Anger_Empowerment
You can see that he goes into wrath forms because he starts to get red and steam comes from his body. He has the ability to go to wrath mode where he gets these choices.
Human: 1/10
Angry: 3/10
1/4 wrath: Gains the ability to use fire as a weapon. He can summon fire from anywhere in his body including from mouth. He can manipulate to make swords or other weapons. But not guns though. His strength improves
5/10
1/2 wrath: He gains the ability to use a red lightning. He can choose to make it powerful but slow or weak but fast. His speed increases on this form
6/10 power
3/4 wrath: He gains super stretchy powers. He also gains the ability to make any part of his body powerful stone. This form increase his durability
8/10 power
100% wrath: He gets overall power in every type. 10/10 strength 10/10 speed 10/10 durability. Also demon horns and a tail that can be used as a deadly weapon.
10/10 power
Embodiment of wrath: Stefan has access to this move when he is about to exit the final form of wrath. What this ability does it heightens Stefans mortality for immortal for one minute where he is actually unstoppable by any degree of attack.
And in all of these his senses are heightened because his blood is moving at a faster rate.
More explanation on this page http://powerlisting.wikia.com/wiki/Wrath_Embodiment
If he for example is inflicted wounds in any form before EX: He was shot in the stomach. Then he can go into the next form to heal immediately.
[/spoiler]

Weakness: [spoiler=] If he is not in Wrath mode, wrath can jump into stefan's brain and mess him up. But this weakness is only 3-8 secs.
He can only access the wrath forms when he is angry or very emotionally struck.
He is smart but can get confused by complex tactics.
He can still be cut and sliced
He does not have the best of stamina.
Reckless like heck.
When possessed by Wrath, he'll sustain damage both during and after.
1/4: Small bodily damage. 20 min The bodily damage for this form is the following: skin gets slightly ripped, small burn marks, tired
1/2: Minor bodily damage. 15 min The bodily damage for this form is the following: skin gets more ripped off, minor burns, more tired
3/4: Large bodily damage. 10 min The bodily damage for this form is the following: Skins gets nearly completely ripped off, bigger burns, extremely tired
4/4: Death comes knocking. 5 min The bodily damage for this form is the following: Skin gets ripped off, extreme burns, organ damage, muscles ripped, bones broken
Final demon blow: Death has used his scythe on Stefan. 1 min The bodily damage for this form is the following: Death
[/spoiler]

Story:
[spoiler=]Stefan's past was a tragic one. But it was not always that way. Stefan had lived a happy peaceful life. But with a terrible lie. One day when Stefan was 10, his sisters and him was taken to a very huge green building. They walked through seemingly endless corridors filled with strange and menacing looking people until they reached another chamber. This chamber looked like a empty glass prison to the naked eye, but in the eyes of those who could see? You would see the enslavement of hundreds of spirits. Demons, dead and even those in limbo. A woman walked up to Stefan and told him with an evil glee, "You work for us now." Two soldiers then walked up to Stefan and put a strange looking collar on him. He was then taken into a dark cold room with a strange pillar in the middle. The pillar was decorated with strange runes and magical yet dark ornaments. Stefan was pulled to this pillar and chained to it. Then a horrifying scream entered Stefan's mind as his spirit was transported to the spirit world. When he was there it was completely empty and was filled with a menacing silence. Stefan stood there for a while until a bright light started to approach him. This light came closer and closer but then extinguished with haste. "You're weak. Nobody, not even the foolish ghouls of the underworld accept freaks like you." A loud voice said to Stefan as he got slowly angrier and angrier. Insults kept being thrown at Stefan's face until he shouted, "Shut up you fuckers!" The voices stopped and a dark red light emerged. The light illuminated a huge red demon. It stood there in front of Stefan in a deadly silence. Then somehow it transported it self into Stefan's spirit. Stefan woke back up with a newly found rage. Why? Because the exact moment he opened his eyes, he saw his dead family right in front of him. Blood was splattered everywhere in the room even on Stefan. Suddenly Stefan felt a strange aura as something grew out of his head. He ripped off the chains and destroyed the pillar as his skin started to get burned. From these burns came strange runes that glowed brightly. He quickly started to break down the walls of his cell and escaped with bullets flying up behind him. After a whole day of running Stefan stopped and fell down to the ground unconscious. When he woke up he was in a strangers house who explained everything. He had the blood of an ancient blood line. Not of royalty..... but of tools. The people who had this blood had the ability to get supernatural powers from spirits by letting them into their body. With this information Stefan went into hiding because he was also told that this power was used in wars and was wanted by many evil people. So he has been in hiding since then.[/spoiler]

Demo battle:
[spoiler=] Gonna make it soon.
[/spoiler]

Battles: 0/1
Available: NOPE fighting XDhunternest
WhiteWood
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Nov 1, 2013 11:57 PM #1101061
The idea is nice, but unfortunately, the writing and character could use some real work. The writing is very choppy and the flow is very lacking, the story and demo have no organization, and the format is hard to look at. When someone is speaking, it starts a brand new paragraph per se. Example:

"You are a goddamn monster, you son of a bitch," said the general.
"I don't care, little bitch," Stefan retorted.

Comma use is very important as well, this will help fix the flow and lower the choppiness in your writing. Also, when writing dialogue for a character who is yelling or screaming, do not type what they say in all caps, that is the worst thing you could do with dialogue. What is better and is even recommended is that you type their dialogue like they were speaking normally but describe their yelling or screaming with words. Example:

"What the fuck is going on, sir?" screamed the officer.

Do not use a question mark and exclamation mark together, that is a big no-no in writing.

Your character is also somewhat overpowered; not even a nuclear strike can kill him? That would make it very difficult to write a battle with character for your opponent. I find him to be quite contradicting as well, you say he hates evil and wishes to eradicate it from the earth and yet you've made him a somewhat evil character, this is described in this line: "He always tries to make his own evil twisted jokes." Now, you can incorporate this evil personality with his goal somehow such as giving him a mental block, perhaps something like insanity, to show that he does not see who he truly is inside.

I hope I was able to clear somethings up for you, practice your writing and perhaps I will challenge you some day. Good luck upon your venture.
devi

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Nov 2, 2013 2:21 AM #1101164
Thank you.
I will practice.
Note: During the demo, he had just introduced wrath into his body.
Phantom Ace
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Nov 2, 2013 10:18 AM #1101383
Your wRHG is pretty nice:D
Though as Cooling Fever said, the demo and story isn't organized. Though I think you could fix it and improve. Good lucl:D
Triss
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Nov 2, 2013 10:28 AM #1101389
Hmmm...
After a long break of writing, I guess I need to discuss some points.

First, add a break, or what do you call: Spacing.
I get a little headache from some paragraphs that is too long.

Second, you need to add narration and description. It is slightly lacking.

Third, fix you medieval grammar. You need some work on that, boy.

Lastly, make some shocking plots/actions. Astonish me!

But I appreciate your interest in wRHG, and I welcome thee.
Xate
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Nov 2, 2013 10:41 AM #1101398
Quote from Triss
Hmmm...
After a long break of writing, I guess I need to discuss some points.

First, add a break, or what do you call: Spacing.
I get a little headache from some paragraphs that is too long.

Second, you need to add narration and description. It is slightly lacking.

Third, fix you medieval grammar. You need some work on that, boy.

Lastly, make some shocking plots/actions. Astonish me!

But I appreciate your interest in wRHG, and I welcome thee.

First 3 points = read others' works, then use their styles to improve yours.

The last? It's yours, so have fun. And Triss? He's new and this is just the demo, so it isn't necessary...yet.
Triss
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Nov 2, 2013 10:45 AM #1101402
Quote from GamerXD8
First 3 points = read others' works, then use their styles to improve yours.

The last? It's yours, so have fun. And Triss? He's new and this is just the demo, so it isn't necessary...yet.

Of course my dear son. I would never scold such beautiful being like you, nor devi.
I can surely have at thee in my van.
Rokon
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Nov 3, 2013 8:25 AM #1101854
Oh you're 13 too? Awesome! I just saw that and the start of your post shorten it next time
Xate
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Nov 3, 2013 8:43 AM #1101858
Quote from Triss
Of course my dear son. I would never scold such beautiful being like you, nor devi.
I can surely have at thee in my van.

...*shudders* And devi, you talking to Triss? I thought he was 16, but yeah. And I saw plenty other 13-year-olds writing, too. For example, merich1! And he's not half bad. Try checking out the battles in wRHGs for awesome battles made by young and old alike.

"Imagination has no limits, I say! Young or old, if you got what it takes, bring it and wow em all! Don't let anyone stand between you and your passion!"

Edit: *facepalm* Why didn't I read before posting...Curses! Well, leaving this here for young aspiring writers! Shoot for the stars! Even if you missed, you would have pierced the sky! >: D
devi

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Nov 4, 2013 4:02 AM #1102239
Thank you very much, I will keep practicing.
XDHunterNest
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Dec 2, 2013 12:16 PM #1117591
Want to battle?
devi

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Dec 2, 2013 12:18 PM #1117592
Quote from XDHunterNest
Want to battle?


Sure. I just need to tryout for a clan then we can.
XDHunterNest
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Dec 2, 2013 12:19 PM #1117593
Kk. Contact me then we can talk about the deadline and such.
Model-T
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Dec 2, 2013 11:16 PM #1117825
Now, my good friend, I am honored to have you as a part of my team, such power will surely come in handy down the road. May we as well as our characters grow together!
devi

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Dec 3, 2013 4:24 AM #1117997
Quote from Model-T
Now, my good friend, I am honored to have you as a part of my team, such power will surely come in handy down the road. May we as well as our characters grow together!


Thank you leader. It is an honor for you to lead me into this world of battles. *Bows*
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