Quote from Bluur

The idea just hit me: how about everytime he uses an ability, it takes time off his life and the watch slowly cracks each battle

If it does that, won't the watch eventually break, and how will he fix it? If it breaks how will he continue to battle not only in the current one but in any battle afterwards?
His watch could drain his internal energy, causing him to become extremely tired after using it, especially for long durations. Say something like (example) "If he uses his watch for over 10 seconds, he becomes exhausted to the point where he can almost not fight anymore".

Quote from iarentevil

If it does that, won't the watch eventually break, and how will he fix it? If it breaks how will he continue to battle not only in the current one but in any battle afterwards?
His watch could drain his internal energy, causing him to become extremely tired after using it, especially for long durations. Say something like (example) "If he uses his watch for over 10 seconds, he becomes exhausted to the point where he can almost not fight anymore".

What I had in mind was, CR do a couple of battles and eventually die. Unless he becomes popular, I dont know yet.
I'll keep that idea in mind though.

Quote from Bluur

What I had in mind was, CR do a couple of battles and eventually die. Unless he becomes popular, I dont know yet.
I'll keep that idea in mind though.

If you write to die, it will show. I would write like he could become a big character, but if it doesn't work out you could do something like smash his watch.

Quote from iarentevil

If you write to die, it will show. I would write like he could become a big character, but if it doesn't work out you could do something like smash his watch.

A possibility. I do hope that CR becomes at least mentionable. So far he doesnt seem a praised as other Gladiators.

Quote from Bluur

A possibility. I do hope that CR becomes at least mentionable. So far he doesnt seem a praised as other Gladiators.

You should see the first responses to mine xD. Just kind of listen to what the others had to say, they're trying to help.
But if you hope he becomes mentionable, write him like he can be. Work on him, make him better, mold him up from what he is currently. I don't know a lot yet, just trying to help.

Quote from Bluur

A possibility. I do hope that CR becomes at least mentionable. So far he doesnt seem a praised as other Gladiators.

I'm only going to say this once: write for you.

Don't beat yourself up if you don't get dozens of comments, and don't worry if everything you write isn't basked in praise. Keep at it until it changes for you.

You have 3 pages on this thread, and I have 0 comments on Hollywood's. Don't read too much into anything. As long as you like what you're doing you don't have to change anything. Change what you see fit and let your character evolve.

Quote from Crank

I'm only going to say this once: write for you.

Don't beat yourself up if you don't get dozens of comments, and don't worry if everything you write isn't basked in praise. Keep at it until it changes for you.

You have 3 pages on this thread, and I have 0 comments on Hollywood's. Don't read too much into anything. As long as you like what you're doing you don't have to change anything. Change what you see fit and let your character evolve.

Thanks, Crank. Really needs that

Quote from Crank

I'm only going to say this once: write for you.

Don't beat yourself up if you don't get dozens of comments, and don't worry if everything you write isn't basked in praise. Keep at it until it changes for you.

You have 3 pages on this thread, and I have 0 comments on Hollywood's. Don't read too much into anything. As long as you like what you're doing you don't have to change anything. Change what you see fit and let your character evolve.

I need that shizzle.

Quote from GamerXD8

I need that shizzle.

Bwahaha Gamer, plz. Your character have pages of comments.

Quote from Crank

I'm only going to say this once: write for you.

Don't beat yourself up if you don't get dozens of comments, and don't worry if everything you write isn't basked in praise. Keep at it until it changes for you.

You have 3 pages on this thread, and I have 0 comments on Hollywood's. Don't read too much into anything. As long as you like what you're doing you don't have to change anything. Change what you see fit and let your character evolve.

^This. As always, my advice fell flat to Crank's wisdom.

Particularly just write for fun, Bluur. If you don't enjoy what you're doing, you shouldn't do it at all.
Either love what you do, and do what you love.

The idea that the watch slowly breaks through usage is something that adds to the character's drama. It adds something to the story and battle. Think of it, a wave of shrapnel approaches CR and he has to choose whether to save himself using the watch but ultimately lowering his life expectancy or to take the full force of the blast and not expend his life force via watch. I like the idea and it balances out better if the character is afraid to die.

But in that case, every battle you make means that CR would be closing in on death but it doesn't have to be that case. You could just make it as the watch cracks and breaks but never does fully break if you intend on using him for an extended time but at some point with all the battles you will have the watch will show its fragility. Its up to you how much the watch breaks every battle.

If you don't go with the 'Powers with a price' path, I suggest you lower some of your powers' strength. Just saying.

CR is updated with the recommended tweaks. Critique would be appreciated.

Edit; I have a feeling this isn't all I need to do.

Quote from ErrorBlender

With the connection to his life force, his powers are nerfed just enough. For me, the character is okay. :D

Alright, cool. So it would be safe to say CR is available then.
Thanks for the help, Error.

No problem, Bluur. Ask the others, it may be fine with me but the others may have a few words or something but I think its okay already :)

I like the change, it makes your character think about "should I use this?".
It seems balanced now.
One thing though, if his mind fatigues it should also make him a little slower to react, and at a point start giving him issues such as double vision.