Quote from Captain Cook

such a good album i paused porn to listen to it

Should be a quote on the album.

I'm more concerned with why you are watching porn while having Stickpage on tab

I literally have one tab of stickpage, one of Beck, three of school projects, one about chris kyle and maybe eight tabs of lesbians slamming their meat purses into each other.

I actually made a comic about the content of my tabs at any given time.

Am I the only one bothered that you are spilling lube all over your table?

Quote from Hewitt

I'm more concerned with why you are watching porn while having Stickpage on tab

d....do you not?

Quote from Hewitt

I'm more concerned with why you are watching porn while having Stickpage on tab

I've done it, and I only mildly regret it.

Quote from Nish

Am I the only one bothered that you are spilling lube all over your table?

It isn't really spilled all over the table, it's spilled from the table.

And yeah.

I always feel puns are stupidly amusing. Some people hate puns, idk why.

Quote from Zero

It was Cronos.

Of course it was, you fucking tool >:V

Everyone knows Cronos is the master of splash comedy.

Another time, when I had first become a young man. We had been working with horses during that chapter of our lives. We already had a few, but decided we wanted another for a person in our lives. However, this person was not very horse savvy, and it was family tradition to have your first horse be a big learning experience. Having been raised on a horse rescue ranch, it's fair to say I was familiar with the ways of rescuing and rehabilitating horses. The horse we chose was one such horse that needed to be both rescued and rehabilitated. And the best person to rescue said horse, happened to be me.

He was black like onyx and built like a brick shit house. A short quarter horse with a fierce physique, but a gentle nature. We went out to the neighboring town to take a look at him. The owners were a couple people who fancied themselves cowboy. But they didn't know how to handle the situation they'd gotten themselves into. The horse stood knee deep in its own shit in a 10x15 pin, no place to lay down and horses only dream when they lay down. He was so scared of human interaction, no one could reach for its face, touch a rope or halter or make any brisk movements without it spooking and threatening to kick. Except for the boy whom lived there.

The horse responded to me the best out of our family. So I told them I'd take a look at the horse, the owners tried to convince me that the horse couldn't be worked with. After a while with the help of the boys insight I got in the pin and managed to get a halter and rope on the horse. The horse having felt cornered in its tiny pin, turning around and threatening to kick me constantly. But even with my boots and jeans caked up with shit to my knees, I calmed my mind and got that done. It didn't take much to convince the horse to get out of the pin, I only had to open the gate and walk out, the horse followed. But keeping a hold of him was a different story.

The horse was afraid to be so near humans, even though I had him at the very end of the line. He kept rearing up, striking with his front hooves or turning around and winding up his legs for a kick. Him tugging on the rope, dragging my feet and causing the clip to clank into his chin agitated him even more. But I took calm breaths didn't make any aggressive motions, no direct eye contact, exasperated gestures or noises. I refrained from using any predatory behavior which exists in the human subconscious. I remained focused and behaved like a horse, I spoke with body language. Once I yawned, the horse began to calm down. If you act with fear, so shall the horse.

It took some time, but I remained calm and talked to the boy who was awestruck, never allowing my attention to leave the horse. Eventually it calmed down to my level and I began inching closer up the rope. Whenever it felt I was too close I backed off immediately, testing its comfort zone until it was fine with me standing right next to it. Then I slowly moved my hand, let it smell my hand until it was comfortable with me touching it. Soon I discovered that the back of the horses head, right behind his ears was a danger zone. Causing the horse to immediately spook into dragging me and or threatening me. I still, to this day, am not entirely certain what happened to the horse to make it that way. But it's safe to assume it had an abusive background.

Once the horse and I trusted each other enough to stand right next to each other and I could pet it. I had to see if the horse could be led. I practiced walking around and getting the horse to follow me. So I walked forward in a straight line, as if I had an important destination, instead of simply tugging with all my might. Since a battle of strength with a horse is absolutely futile. Sure enough after a few attempts the horse became interested and started to follow, even though I knew that the horse could've bolted and escaped at any time it wanted to, easily ripping the rope right out of my hands. But the rope acted as an illusion, a false tether between us. The true tether was our trust. I'd been making friends with the horse.

I spent the rest of the day trying to teach it to lunge "The circle game as Pat Parelli calls it", using my trench coat to desensitize him as I liked to do and basically doing my best to build trust and understanding of my physical ques with the horse as I could. But the day had run out and the night was approaching . We'd decided that we would take the horse, the owners said we could have him if we could load him up. And a few more days it would take, a few chilling days in the Deschutes forest. Each day can only be described as insufferable. Neighbors on both sides with horses in similar situations, I remember seeing children riding said horses unsupervised on barely fenced acre sized lots. Striking the horses over and over while on their back, spurring them as hard as they can in the sides. While other children run amuck beneath, behind and around the horse. Nearby metal rebars and T-posts sharply jutting out of the ground. It was easy for me to see the disaster that would inevitably strike to the children, horse or both. The most painful thing was knowing I could only deal with the one situation. But the ignorance I witnessed made me furious. I knew I had to do whatever I could to get this horse, my friend, into safe hands.

So each day I worked, each day returning home quietly drained physically, mentally and emotionally. Jeans and boots filthy, hands burned by rope. Until all too soon the day had arrived, we'd brought our horse trailer with us and me with nothing more to prepare myself other than my hat and American flag bandanna. Honestly, I was totally unsure if I could get it done. I only knew I had to get it done. I had no choice but to trust the bond I'd built, but I imagine for all as scared as I was that he was even more scared. So I asked my family to open the trailer door while I went back to him, got him out of his pin and worked with him for a little while to make sure we were both on the same page. Soon I was going to lead a terrified fourteen hundred pound animal, that has no depth perception into a noisy metal death trap and I only had one chance to do it.

He was calm with his head down and I knew it was the right time. I pet him gently on the neck and whispered "Let's take you home, buddy". I summoned all the trust I had, only hoping the horse did the same and without looking back a single time I lead him straight into the back of the trailer, tied him up and closed the two doors behind him. My breath as quiet as a heartbeat, my heartbeat pounding like god slamming his car door. I heard the owner of the horse say "That's bullshit", but the boy showed nothing but respect. We shook hands, took the horse and during the hour long drive back no one spoke a word. When I unloaded the horse, it wasn't snowy anymore, but bright and sunny. I spent that night slowly and silently cleaning the shit off my boots with a cup of water and a handkerchief.

I never fancy myself a Cowboy, I even think Horseman is a little much.
But I've got a horse tattooed on my back, so that I'll never forget this chapter of my life.

Quote from GrimmtheReaper

Of course it was, you fucking tool >:V

Everyone knows Cronos is the master of splash comedy.

Sorry to burst your bubble but: you tool

Quote from Ipman

Hahah lol!
I remember someone else doing that picture thing in the chat thread.. But i couldnt find what page that was

Quote from Ipman

I remember someone else doing that picture thing in the chat thread

Quote from Ipman

I remember someone else

Quote from Ipman

someone else

sss I need you to friend me so you can monitor all my posts then give me a funny scale ranking out of 100 so I can learn to be funny pls

In other news Anonymous are doing more a lot more damage to ISIS online than anyone else.

Give them an award for bravery. We made fun of the terrorists, yay! We won!