Make the wizard zap the seal and turn it into a frog. Huehuehue... classic

Quote from GrimmtheReaper

Make the wizard zap the seal and turn it into a frog. Huehuehue... classic

He zaps the seal, shaping it into a tiny, yellow... something. That's disappointing for him, who usually doesn't cast the wrong spell.

Quote from Fries

Prepare breakfeast. While eating cereal, ponder why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Afterwards, get dressed because fuck showers. Prepare to depart the fort.

Dishonoring his daily routine of biscuits dunking at breakfast, he seeks the answer by eating a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
"This is fucking bullshit propanganda i swear".
He then skips showering and is already dressing, he's gonna sweat a lot anyway.

And ok, now we have to prepare for our departure, but what should we bring with us?

Put on fedora, for plus six euphoria points. Of course, equip favourite wand and spell book, as well as season 3 of Friends.

Put on your awesome wizard hat, and grab your smoking pipe. Time to go pester some hobbits and dwarves...

Take a poster of JB as the symbol of epicness.
Go to garage and break your motorcycle. VROOM VROOM.

Quote from extrafred

Take a poster of JB as the symbol of epicness.
Go to garage and break your motorcycle. VROOM VROOM.

Don't fuck around like that.

Take a few cans of Based God brand Purple DRANK out the fridge. Hey what's up with the numbers on his beard and hat?

Quote from Golden

Hey what's up with the numbers on his beard and hat?

Maybe he's a mathmagician BUH DUM TISS! //tomatoed

sorry for not updating this before, but flash crashed several times during the last few days...

Quote from Golden

Take a few cans of Based God brand Purple DRANK out the fridge.

Quote from GrimmtheReaper

Put on your awesome wizard hat, and grab your smoking pipe. Time to go pester some hobbits and dwarves...

Quote from Fries

Put on fedora, for plus six euphoria points. Of course, equip favourite wand and spell book, as well as season 3 of Friends.

Since he can't decide between the fedora and the awesome wizard hat, he brings both of them, and of course the other things and a pouch - bigger in the inside - where to store the pills, 5 purple dranks and the third season of some sitcom.

He also takes one of the pills right away.

Quote from extrafred

Take a poster of JB as the symbol of epicness.

A poster of Johannes brahms is taken from one of the garage's wall, and hey he even resembles a bit our mage, isn't that nice?


Ok, moving on, he now exits the keep, also bringing his favorite spellbook: "Wicked Warlocks and Holy Engineers" And his wand: "Best Wang". Now he doesn't have a free grasp




"Umhhh, did i forgot something?"

Pester the dorfs twice as much, to make up for the lack of hobbits...

Oh look, just noticed that someone replied to this dead thread some hours ago.

Quote from GrimmtheReaper

Pester the dorfs twice as much, to make up for the lack of hobbits...

"Yea, i'm a fucking mage, it can be done."


Now he can see physical bodies through floors, walls and other physical bodies. But the bad side is that he will see all black and white until the spell is undone.

Quote from iarentevil

Take the red pill, and disappear randomly into a cartoon. Specifically the "Don't hug me I'm scared" cartoon. Only to realize he forgot his gloves, which were the only things to protect him from the magic emanating from his wand. He can now cast no spell without affecting himself.

Aw shiet, none of those pills is totally red, they are all blue and red.

And about the staff, what the hell are you talking about? It's clearly alimented with an uranium bar. It doesn't emanates magic, it costantly emits radiation!
But no worries, nowadays gloves are the ultimate answer to this kind of shit, so he wore one. See?


Ok going back to the story, he temporarily turns the wand into a shovel in case he needs to go underground.

He uses the shovel to dig through the sky because screw logic, we have magic.
He digs until we meet the dorfs.
They say something about some mysterious quest.
Why did we come outside today?