I hate being nice, but im cursed with it. I have always had way too much compassion. It sucks, and I am not saying that as if I were a saint. I just have always had a soft spot for people who never had a father though....and well, she doesn't.
I can relate. But hear me out. Because me being able to relate is what will help you out.
Here's a story for you:
A couple months back, I came to the realization that I was always the victim of some girl's tricks, vents, anger, frustration, lies, or disloyalty. And it wasn't like I was friend-zoned or anything (at least most of the time it wasn't), it was the fact that I just always got the short end of the stick with a girl while someone else got the benefit. Throughout all of them there was one common denominator, me. So I sat down with some friends one day, pleading them to tell me what it was I was doing that was causing all these girls to do these negative acts to me. Because one thing that's impossible to do, is actually notice the small subtle things that your personality carries that can cause someone or multiple amounts of people to act around you or towards you. My close friends were the people who saw it the most, and willingly could speak to me about it. So after some evaluation and discussion, the truth finally spilled out. It was because I gave everyone this sense of comfort, this sense that no matter what you did I would accept you regardless of the consequences. Because I get along so well with everyone, they feel as though they can do something and I won't disgrace them because of it. Not only that but because I was actually a good person, girls who find themselves to be whores and bad people (and gentlemen, believe it or not, this is the mass majority of women) feel as though I'm too good for them. And then they decide to vent out on me because I gave them that sense that I'm someone who you can say anything to.
At first when I was told this, I was astonished. To sum it up I was still in disbelief. I continued to question them asking how that even made sense. But every time I mentioned something bad that happened between me and a girl, it connected to our philosophy of just being a victim because you're a good person. After all of this, I came to a conclusion. I decided for a short period of time, I would become this heartless and uncaring asshole who would treat women as nothing more than chop liver and toys. With this I would see the other side of the spectrum. I began going through this phase where I flirted with at least 15 different girls, approaching them and being straight forward with them saying I thought they were cute and I found them attractive. A good majority of them decided to meet up and we did physical things, plain and simple. But, it didn't last long. Within a month's time, I found myself making these girls laugh. That sounds harmless, but I'm saying that my personality was enjoyable to them and they began to feel comfortable around me. Well see, this was the problem before. But that is when I had the massive epitome.
I, for the life of me, cannot be disrespectful to women. I legitimately am not capable of getting to know someone for the sole purpose of using them for sexual intention or physical pleasure. Mainly because I don't find myself as strong of a striver for those things to begin with. So, if being a super outgoing and comfortable person wasn't an option, and being a heartless asshole was out of the question, what was there to do?
The answer? Stop giving a fuck about all of it. Legit. Girls suck. No matter how you end up normally with them, you'll get the short of the end stick regardless. Mainly because you make those girls your focus. As hard as they try to make it seem like it's not the case, those heartless douchebags are heartless douchebags because they're aiming to attract girls with that personality. Plain and simple. Your focus is not love or lust because it happens naturally. What's the point of focusing on it if you're not in control of it?
Boom.